Open your eyes
by Thecricketsarecalling
Summary: Arthur and Cobb have more in common than most people think. They both lost people they loved and let their dreams become their escape.
1. Chapter 1

"Non, je ne regrette rien" - Edith Piaf

_**2007**_

Arthur honestly could say the exact date and time when his entire life fell apart. It was May 28th, at 4:37 PM. The day started off like any other day, he woke up feeling completely happy and content with where he was and how his life was going. He was twenty-five years old, perfectly healthy and very much in love. Once 4:38 PM hit, just a mere sixty seconds after his life came crashing down around him, he would forever look back on that morning and try his hardest to remember ever single detail for his memory…and his dreams.

That afternoon he had left the university with a little extra spring in his step. He had the next three days off from class, and his theory pitch paper had excited the professor so much he asked to meet with him the following week. He had enjoyed his morning classes, laughing and enjoying what he did best…

Learn.

He had walked out onto the beautiful campus with his messenger bag thrown over his shoulder and a gentle warm breeze hitting his face. The weather lately had been wonderful and today there didn't seem to be a cloud in the sky. Walking down the cobble stone walkway, he looked at the cherry blossom trees gently rocking back and forth and smiled. He passed a few people who were in his classes and smiled and said hello. Heading to the parking-lot he decided he would take Regan out for dinner tonight. He couldn't wait to tell her about the reaction his idea for the paper had gotten and share the excitement he felt flowing through his body.

Reaching for his keys in his pocket, he heard them jingle before pulling them out. Opening his car door, he lifted his bag off and put it in the passenger seat. Sitting, and closing the door behind him he stopped for a second and looked at his hands resting of the steering wheel.

His right hand held his keys which gently swayed back and forth, the other rested against the wheel and that's when he stared at his white gold wedding band. For no reason at all, Arthur smiled. Looking back he knew what that exact moment was, and deep in his heart he knew something had changed. The moment passed as quickly as he came as he started the engine and slowly backed out. Reaching for the radio he switched it on and a depeche mode song came on. Remembering last summer, he had taken Regan to one of their concerts for her birthday. Gently tapping his hands against the steering wheel, he turned and took the exit to get onto the highway.

Humming along, he thought it would be nice if Regan and him went for a swim in the pool for a couple of hours. They had just opened it the weekend before and since the weather had gotten so warm in the last few days they had been using it more and more often. He thought a couple of beers, and swimming around before dinner would be a nice way to unwind. In a couple of days they were going to have a few of their friends over and the backyard had never looked so good before. They took pride in their townhouse and made their backyard their own. Regan had planted most of the flowers, mostly exotic ones that were beginning to just bloom. The two of them had made a coy fish pond, and laid down this beautiful stone gravel that was raked perfectly. He knew that to some, they would think how boning it was for a married couple in their mid twenties to do such dull things and take pride in them…but still it was their home, it was the place they loved being the best, and they had made it their own.

He thought of them lying on their back deck, looking up at the sky with his arm around her and knowing that he was honestly the luckiest man in the world.

Smiling, he drove for another ten minutes before taking the exit ramp. He loved the little town outside of the city they lived in. It was charming and looked gorgeous in the fall when the trees were brilliant colors of red, orange, and gold. Passing the brick school house, and the coffee shop, he turned up the road, passing the apple orchard and found the freshly cut green hilly lawns and the beautiful old Victorian framed town houses lining the way. Driving slowly, he saw kids on their bikes and smiled before finding his house.

Turning, he parked outside and saw Regan's civic was parked in their tiny driveway. Regan worked from home and had mentioned that morning she had an over the phone meeting with her editor and then was going to sit out back and work until he came home. Taking his keys out, he reached for his bag and got out. Shutting his door, he looked up across the road and saw the sprinklers were on. Behind the houses was the woods, and beyond that some farm land. Stretching for a second he saw Mr. Anderson sitting on his porch in his rocking chair.

"Hello Arthur, how are you?"

Arthur smiled and waved back.

"Not too bad, yourself?"

"Oh I've just planted myself down for a spell…waiting for the firework show tonight."

Arthur raised an eyebrow.

"Fireworks?"

"Oh yeah, across the pond. That highway that's graduating is setting them off , they were saying at the town center it's gonna be one pretty show. Ain't anything better than the smell of gun power on the air, huh son?"

Arthur smiled, he enjoyed Mr. Anderson, even though he still talked and believed it was the year 1955. He was sweet neighbor though, in fact Arthur and Regan were the youngest people living on this street.

"That sounds pretty cool, Regan loves fireworks, we'll have to sit on the back deck and watch them."

"Oh yes, it bet you'll have a nice pretty view that's for sure."

Arthur smiled before waving.

"See you later Mr. Anderson."

"Same here boy, same here!"

Turning, Arthur walked up the walkway and checked the cast iron mailbox on the front porch. He found some junk mail and a few things for Regan, besides that nothing important enough besides their cell phone bill. Tucking it under his arm he smiled and wondered if Regan would want to have a repeat of earlier this week if she wasn't too tired. Thinking back on the weekend before he grinned and looked down at himself and chuckled to himself. Turning around, he took his keys and went to open the door when…

He stopped.

The door was open a crack.

Arthur raised an eyebrow and looked at the door was if it was some unknown passageway. They never forgot to lock the door, even though they lived in a nice neighborhood. His eyes stared at the stained glass front of the door and the curtain behind it that blocked any view of their small landing. The crack as just an inch or so, but more than enough to wake him think twice.

Slowly he held his keys and the mail and pushed the door open.

"Hey Regan?"

He called out as he usually did, but there was no answer.

Stepping inside, the lovely scent of vanilla filled the air. Sunlight poured in through the windows, causing tiny little flakes of golden colored dust to float around above the hardwood floor. Shutting the door behind him, Arthur took his bag and put it near the table where a crystal bowl held their spare keys.

"Regan?"

He knew he was probably still on the back deck. Walking through the living room, he froze again.

A table was knocked over, the same long wooden table that sat behind their sofa. The one that had the framed photos of the two of them and Regan's tiny glass dragon figures. Standing in the doorway of the living room, Arthur's eyes scanned the mess that had been made and his heart skipped a beat. The table was turned over and laid on its side. There was broken glass scattered everywhere.

His dark worried brown eyes landed on the broken photograph of the two of them on their wedding day. Right away panic filled his entire body and for a brief moment he honestly didn't know if he could move. Taking a second his insides shook.

"REGAN!"

He yelled, not taking his eyes off the table. He half expected to have her come out from the kitchen behind him, holding her hand out wrapped in a dish towel telling him how she had been clumsy and had ran right into the table.

There was silence.

Slowly Arthur began to back up, hurrying to the kitchen he saw the back glass sliding doors were open. Outside he heard birds chirping. His eyes darted around, waiting to see her come out at any moment before he hurried back to the landing and looked up the stairs.

"REGAN!"

Still no answer.

He saw a few of the photos that were framed on the wall beside the staircase were slanted and out of place as if somebody was running up the stairs and had whacked them with their hands. Arthur also noticed the thrown rug was skidded to the side.

He felt himself begin to shake.

"No, please no…please…"

He muttered, his words broken up as he nearly tripped going up the stairs. Suddenly he felt sick to his stomach and dizzy. Grabbing the railing, he hurried up the stairs.

That's when the grandfather clock in the hallway read 4:37.

He stood at the top of the stairs and right away everything went blank. He stood there with the most dreaded look in his eyes, nothing but utter heartbreak as he looked down and saw his wife laying in the hallway.

It took him a second, honestly not letting his mind catch up to what he was seeing. He blinked twice and his throat ached. Staring at her, he also saw the blood which was all over the floor. His mind unable to honestly take this all in, for a brief second he tried to tell himself it was just a stupid joke. Just a prank to scare him. He couldn't count how many times they would jump out at each other and laugh at the other one's reaction. He stood there, almost as if he wasn't himself anymore. That he was watching from above and that it was just like a play. He watched himself float a few steps closer before his knees almost buckled and he held onto the wall. Tears blurred his vision as he shook his head.

"No…"

He shook his head quickly like a child before he came close enough to truly see her.

She was lying on her back. She was wearing her plum colored sundress and black tights. Her hair was drawn back in a loose ponytail, and her earrings, ones he had gotten her at a garage sale a few months back since they were flashy and gypsy looking. He saw she didn't have shoes on either, she just laid there, her arms bent and laying across slummed over like dead wire.

Arthur's legs buckled and he fell hard on his knees just a few inches away from her. His hands were trembling and locking up as a numbness swept over his entire body.

"Regan?"

He was able to choke out in-between tears, hoping there would be any chance at all that she would open her eyes and laugh. He of course with be angry with her, but hold her tight, inhaling the faint scent of perfume she always wore and burying face into her shirt. He would hold her as tight as he could, and break down crying in front of her like that one time when they were first engaged and staying at that cabin two summers ago. She often joked that they better die on the same exact day when they were in their nineties since she honestly didn't know what the two of them would do without each other.

Her throat had been slit in a crude horrible way. The blood was still fresh and hadn't clotted or changed a brownish copper color. Instead it was an ugly purple almost black color and it had stopped trickling and dully pulsing out of her. It was stained all over her neck and the front of her dress. Underneath her was a tacky pool of her own blood which more than likely had soaked into the back of her dress and hair.

Her eyes were open but clouded, not the beautiful striking blue he loved to look at. They stared up at the ceiling with no life or expression in them at all. He saw she had been stabbed once or twice in the upper stomach and chest. The welted blood stains showed splashed patterns on her. Arthur saw a third stab mark in the center of her stomach. Blood had gathered nearly everywhere and he felt it soak into the knees of his slacks. Her skin color was paler and her lips a purple blue color. He also saw her tights had been torn as well.

Arthur looked her over, waiting for her to wake up before his face completely crumbled and he let out the most hopeless pain induced scream that Mr. Anderson from across the street heard it.

_**Later…**_

Two police cars and an ambulance were parked in front of Arthur's house. The lights were flashing and some neighbors were gathered around outside wondering what had happened. Whispers in the crowd said that something horrible had happened. Regan, that lovely young girl who was married to Arthur who wrote those children's books had been murdered. It appeared someone had broken in when Arthur was at school and had done it. Nobody knew anything besides that but pretended they did.

The most common question was how Arthur was, and how horrible it must have been to find his wife like that.

"Such a sweet young couple, I would have never expected this to happen in a town like this."

Many of the neighbors said. Mr. Anderson who had come over and found Arthur had his wife call the police. When they arrived it took three officers to drag Arthur away from the body. Now he sat inside on his sofa, in-between Bettina, a lovely middle aged woman who lived next door and the Andersons. Bettina gently rubbed Arthur's back as two police officers took his statement. Bettina was a single mother whose children were off in college. The first day Regan and Arthur had moved in she welcome them with a fresh pot of coffee and homemade apple pie. She was a sassy woman that they had some good laughs with. Sitting there, she did what honestly no one else could. Arthur had been adopted, and had no family. Lucy had an older brother who she hadn't spoken to in year seven years ever since her parents had died, besides that everyone else was so distant Arthur couldn't even say if any calls should be made. In fact, Arthur wasn't even in the state to make any decisions. One of the paramedics had given him something and now he just sat there numbed out and in shock. Bags were under his eyes and he stared blankly off into space as police men walked in and out of the house.

He heard cameras going off upstairs and a few minutes later two paramedics slowly came downstairs with a black rubber body bag. Arthur looked over one of the officer's shoulders and saw this and his face crumbled all over again.

"DON'T TOUCH HER!"

He screamed out, before Bettina held his hand tightly. Looking down at himself, he completely broke out as tears gushed out of his eyes. Bettina held him as he whaled loudly and screamed through his horsed cries. The officers eyed each other and sighed.

They said what must have happened was that there was a knock on the front door earlier. From what they could piece together Regan had answered the door and was attacked at gun or knife point. She had ran and panicked and ran up the stairs where the attacker had caught up with her. There was an all points bulletin for the surrounding areas, and police officers were going door to door questioning anyone who might have seen anyone or any strange cars or vans parked nearby.

Mr. Anderson claimed he had come out on his porch just a few minutes before Arthur had pulled up and didn't see anything nor hear anything.

All of Regan's jewelry was stolen, along with Arthur's watch and stereo in the office they shared upstairs near their bedroom. Besides that nothing else seemed to be missing. There were people still taking photos and dusting for fingerprints as well.

Arthur thought this type of thing only happened in the movies, not to him and his wife who he honestly knew he had loved with all his heart and still hadn't let the shock fully set in that this was really happening. Instead he just sobbed against Bettina as she held him.

"There must be somebody to call…"

Mrs. Anderson said. Bettina looked over and shrugged.

"I'm sure there's some family and friends, I'll look for his address book…"

Arthur cried even harder as she tried her hardest to sooth him. The two officers looked at each other and cleared their throats.

"Is there anyone who might have had something against you and your wife? Anyone who was bothering her, someone that she might have mentioned."

Arthur couldn't answer, instead he cried until his chest hurt. Bettina shot the officers a dirty look and shook her head.

"Now's not the time officers, maybe tomorrow."

Regan's body was loaded up into the back of the ambulance and driven to the state hospital twelve miles away. Everyone still stood around outside wondering what exactly had happened. Inside, everyone began clearing out.

Arthur couldn't stop crying and laid against Bettina's chest, tears trickling down his face as he moaned. He couldn't stand this, everything had gone numb. He wanted Regan, she always made him feel better. He just wanted her with him, to put his arms around her and know what no matter what…everything would be okay.

Almost in a complete daze he laid there as Bettina rubbed his back and told the officers he would stay with her tonight. That's when, out of the horrible fog that was overtaking him, he heard one of the cops say…

"She was raped…"

It was settle enough, and the officer was across the room talking with someone else but he heard it just the same. His heart feeling as if it was about to burst, he took deep breaths and honestly thought he was going to throw up. Sitting there the room began to spin.

"I…want my wife…"

Arthur mumbled as he pulled away from Bettina's grip. Right away her eyes seemed heartbroken as she tried to reach and touch his arm. Flinching away, he looked sick to his stomach before attempting to stand up. The two officers gave each other looks before he repeated himself.

"I want my wife, where…is she…"

"Arthur please sit back down honey…"

Arthur stood there for a second before falling to his knees. Right away everyone jump up to help him. Arthur sat there, on his knees with his head bent down looking at the floor. Slightly rocking back and forth, he moaned loudly before looking up at Bettina who was at his side again.

His raw exhausted eyes looked at her with nothing but pain.

"I want her back Bettina, please…"

Lowering his head he continued to cry.

At that exact moment Regan's body was being loaded into the morgue. The two doctors carefully unzipped the body bag and shook their heads before looking at the police report.

"What a shame, she's young."

One doctor noticed something; her wedding ring was still on. Several months ago, Regan had slammed her finger into her desk draw, causing her finger to smell. Since then her wedding ring had gotten stuck. Once she joked to Arthur that the two of them better stay married since it seemed fate didn't want her to ever take that ring off ever.

Her attacker had struggled with getting it off before giving up in complete panic.

The autopsy began and an hour and a half into it one of the doctors looked up at the other one and sighed.

"Jesus, how far along you think she was?"

The other doctor sighed under his mask before shrugging.

"Eleven, ten weeks…maybe."

"Jesus, what is the world coming to…"

All the while, Arthur slept over at Bettina's. The paramedics had sedated him for the night and Bettina had been up half the night making calls. Regan's aunt who lived in Los Angeles was flying out as soon as possible once she heard the news. So far this was the only family she seemed to be able to get hold of.

Arthur slept and began what would become the only thing that truly kept him sane. Something he would in later years try to master into perfection, something that would become an obsession.

He dreamed of her.


	2. Chapter 2

_**2010**_

"Arthur?"

Jolting awake, Arthur's eyes snapped open as Ariadne stared down at him. Her eyes concerned as she took a step back. Looking around the room, Arthur nervously reached into his pocket with shaken hands and took the dice. Leaning forward he threw it in-between his feet and heard the heavy click as it hit the floor. Sighing with relief, he crudely yanked the needle out of his wrist and rubbed it roughly.

Looking around he found himself in the warehouse, it was mid afternoon and he had been asleep for nearly twenty minutes.

"Are you okay?"

Reaching down and grabbing the dice, Arthur shoved it back into his pocket before standing up. As always it took a second for his eyes to adjust before he went over to the machine and shut it off.

"Yeah I'm fine…"

He mumbled.

Ariadne watched him closely before tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

"I came over to work on a few more layouts, Cobb wanted to meet with me and…"

Her words trailed off before she looked at him, nervously biting her bottom lip as he put his back to her. Trying to keep himself together, he packed the machine away and controlled his breathing even though his heart raced inside his chest.

"Um, what were you doing?"

Arthur continued packing the machine away.

"I was just testing out a few kinks in the system, I usually run it down before we start up for another test run."

Ariadne closely watched him before nodding.

"Why do you and Cobb use it so often, didn't you say it was dangerous? That people can lose control over what is reality?"

Arthur felt himself getting annoyed, he knew if he turned to face her she would know.

"That's hard for you to say seeing that you've just been introduced to the system. That's the difference between Cobb and me and everyone else…"

Knowing she wasn't getting anywhere, Ariadne simply nodded before grabbing her backpack.

"I'll be downstairs, tell me when Cobb gets here."

Arthur nodded and waited until he heard her leave. Finally he exhaled loudly and locked his legs together before gripping the table. He felt faint. Reaching into his shirt, he took out what he really needed to touch. What he held onto whenever he honestly was confused. Something that only a few select knew about. The chain pulled out and two rings dangled against his shirt. Touching the diamond ring and the silver band, he squeezed them in his palm and waited until that terrible panic feeling floated away.

Finally after a few deep breaths he knew he was okay.

Stepping back he sighed and looked around the big empty room. He was awake now, and he was alone. Standing there, he took a second to remember what he had been woken from.

Closing his eyes, he could still almost feel her touch, smell her sweet scent, and hear her voice.

"Oh Arthur, I just want you to be happy…"

Opening his eyes he quickly wiped away a single tear that had escaped. Quickly turning back to his work he knew he would have to get himself together before the others came in. Taking a second, he shoved the chain back in his shirt and wished that he hadn't ever woken up.


	3. Chapter 3

_**2007**_

Arthur woke up and for a brief second he honestly thought he would find himself in his bed with Regan sleeping beside him. Usually he always woke the same, feeling her body curled up against his and an arm tightly around her waist in a very protecting manner. Every morning was the same, sunlight would be pouring through the windows and Arthur would always find himself no matter how tired he was happy about where exactly he was at that moment.

Just last Sunday he had woken to Regan laying beside him, her beautiful blue eyes smiling at him. He remembered lazily smiling at her and telling her in his dried voice good morning. He remembered how she smiled and leaned over, pressing her lips against his and slightly opening them. Slowly her hands reached underneath their plush comforter and found the waistband of his sweatpants. Her hands went down them and one hand lightly squeezed his penis. Almost right away he found himself with a pretty impressive erection and began cracking up. Regan cocked her head to the side giving a sly smile and asking him what exactly that was. Still laughing, he took hold of her and rolled over on top of her. Kissing her down her neck, he yanked his sweatpants down.

"Something you'll have to take care of…"

He reached for her shorts and yanked them down as much as he could before positioning himself on top of her. Within seconds he pushed down and nearly climaxed. Moaning, he stiffened and grabbed hold of her. Regan clawed into his back and moved her hips.

"Fuck, I'm gonna come."

Regan's soft lips gently touched his before nuzzling his neck. That's when they locked eyes, usually when they did this the two of them would go dead silent. They would have just a few minutes of utter silence, staring at each other with only the dull creaking of the bed beneath them. It would continue until he worked his way into making her orgasm, in which her back would arch and she would snap her eyes shut before crying out loudly. Sex for the two of them had always been enjoyable. In fact it was safe to say, Regan had honestly been the best he ever had. She often poked fun, saying the only reason he was so horny was the fact he was in his mid twenties and just beginning to peek when it came to his sexual lifestyle. But Arthur knew this wasn't true, he had slept with three others girls before Regan, once of which was a one night stand. With Regan he felt comfortable. He knew it didn't seem like it, but he had been sorta shy beforehand. With Regan he could be forward, he could be silly and carefree. With Regan he couldn't seem to help himself. Just thinking about her drove him crazy. He loved making love to her and even though they were playful and had fun when it came to sex…he still couldn't seem to wrap his head around it.

There was just something about her made him feel amazing. He knew that if it was up to him, they would spend the rest of their life's, making love every possible second they had. In fact he didn't even find himself turning or giving any other woman a second look. To him Regan was his everything, and as far as he knew she felt the same exact way about him. On their honeymoon, he remembered the two of them laying in bed talking and how she gently touched his face and told him just looking at him made her crazy. She just wanted to bite and squeeze him, it was as if he had put her under some sort of spell.

Arthur remembered how she had stiffened and how completely out of nowhere after a good half an hour of heavy petting and kissing, she had wrapped her legs tightly around him and began to cry out again. One thing he knew about the two of them was the fact every time they had sex, the both of them were always left breathless and drained.

Arthur bucked his head before opening his mouth and moaning, a few seconds later his entire body felt as if it was on pins and needles when he buried his head against her shoulder and felt her cry again. Seconds later, his bangs hanging in his face and his heart still pounding, he lifted his head and stared down at her.

She had smiled, kissing his cheek before nuzzling into his shoulder.

He remembered the rest of the day clearly. How they had just stayed that way for another twenty minutes before hopping into the shower together. They stayed in there before the pressure died down and the water felt like ice. Drying off and changing they went downstairs and made themselves a huge breakfast.

Arthur remembered flipping pancakes at the stove and how Regan was humming under her breath as she cut up fruit. Suddenly he remembered how pale she looked for a second and how it sounded as if she was about to burp. Covering her mouth she shut her eyes for a second and Arthur watched her.

"You okay?"

Regan opened her eyes and smiled before waving her hand and going back to what she was doing.

The two of them ate on the back deck and mostly made love for the rest of the morning and afternoon.

It had been the perfect day and it had ended with them laying on the couch listening to records and laughing…

Arthur remembered laying there with her, looking up at the ceiling and thinking…

"I'm lucky to be alive."

When Arthur found that he was alone and in a strange bed, suddenly all the reality of what happened came crashing down on him like a pile of bricks. His stomach twisted, his head throbbed, and he felt as if his heart was being torn out of his chest. Taking a second, he sat up, squinting and looking around the bedroom which right away Arthur remembered as being Bettina's son's room before he went off to school. Sitting up in the odd stiff feeling sheets, he looked around as sunlight poured in. All at once images of Regan laying in a pool of blood came back to him. Her throat had been slit, she had been stabbed, and raped. Just for the thousand or so dollars worth of jewelry she had collected over the years and his stereo. His wife who he had met at the park, his wife who he had married in autumn, his wife who was his best friend and honestly his soul mate was gone. Taking a second he blinked, this couldn't be happening, not to him. Things like this happened to other people, not him. He would just take a second and everything would be okay. That's when he knew…His wife had been alive less than eighteen hours ago…Now? He was all alone. Sitting up his dark eyes looked around the bedroom before it hit him again.

His wife had been raped and murdered.

His face crumpling, he bent forward and a horrible haggard moan escaped his lips.

At that exact moment there was a light knock on the door and Bettina and his aunt Sara came in. Sara looked almost the same from the last time he saw her which was earlier that winter. Sara had been Arthur's adopted father's sister.

Arthur was no longer close with his adopted parents due to something that happened a few years ago which tore the family apart. His adopted mother Mary still wrote, checking up on him and Regan but would never visit. In fact both of them didn't show up to Regan and his wedding simply out of protest. Sara had been the closest he had come to family, she was one of the few that really had believed him and had cut off almost all ties with her brother and his side of the family.

She was an artist and taught classes a few times a week at a community college back home. She was a carefree spirit who smoked pot, talked politics, and usually had a great sense of humor when it came to life. She visited often and had loved Regan. Now she came in with Bettina, her eyes full with pity.

"Oh honey…"

Both older women came to him and sat on opposite sides of the bed and held him. Arthur lifted his head enough to look at Sara. Seeing her tears made him cry even louder before she gathered him into her arms and gently stroked his head.

"Shhhh, it's okay…"

_**Later…**_

"Here honey, drink some of this."

Arthur was in sweatpants and his university hoodie that Regan often wore in the fall whenever they were doing yard work together. In fact, he could still faintly smell her perfume on it. Staring blanking at Bettina's kitchen table, he had tuned everything out.

Sara pushed him a small crystal class which more than likely had rum in it.

Arthur just stared ahead before Bettina came over with some waffles and toast.

"Come on Arthur, you need to eat something you look too pale…"

Arthur didn't say anything, instead he just stared ahead as the two women gently rubbed his arms.

The rest of the morning was a blur; Sara had taken his address book in the other room and began making calls as well as the funeral arrangements. Bettina stayed in the kitchen with him, forcing him to eat a little something and to drink plenty of coffee. Arthur sat there, eating the food but not tasting it. Instead he just zoned out replaying yesterday over and over and over again in his mind.

What if he had left class a half an hour earlier? Would this even would have happened?

He felt sick but sat there, nervously playing with his wedding band. He wanted Regan badly; she was usually the one person who made him feel comfortable. She had been the one who always made everything better. He couldn't even remember how many times he had to go to events at the university and how bringing Regan and having her by his side made him feel a million times better. As of right now it all seemed like too much. He needed her right now.

Finally two police officers arrived a little before ten. They rang the bell and were invited in. Arthur didn't exactly remember how he had walked to the living room but at one point he found himself sitting between Bettina and Sara and answering the same questions.

He told them when he had left the house, when he had arrived at school, and when he had left campus. He guessed at the times the best he could and told them how he had talked to Mr. Anderson before going into the house. He recalled how the door had been opened and that's when he felt a knot build up in his throat as he continued. Sara held his hand.

He told them how he had called out for Regan and how she hadn't answered, then how he saw the table knocked over and ran up the stairs and…

He stopped and for a brief second his eyes blurred with tears. He struggled and fought his way through his words. Finally he finished and felt like he just broke surface from water. Sitting there his insides shook and he knew that he would have to repeat this same exact story at least a million more times. He knew after a while it would just feel like second nature. Sitting there, he listened to the police and felt it becoming harder and harder to breath.

They explained there was still an all points bulletin and that they were still looking in the surrounding areas. So far there hadn't been any leads and that there hadn't been any fingerprints or hair.

Arthur then looked up, feeling like a monster in a dream.

"What about…semen sample?"

The two police officers looked at each other and Arthur felt Sara's grip tighten on his hand. One police officer cleared his throat.

"The attacker wore a condom we believe, some of the tests won't be back until later this week but as of right now there's no evidence."

Arthur lowered his head and wanted to ask if his wife had fought back. He wanted to know if it had hurt or if she was aware what was happening to her when it happened. He wanted to know what bastard killed his twenty-five year old wife. He wanted to know what bastard had done this to her, and he wanted to know if he could kill them.

"I want to see her."

The police officers eyed each other.

"There's no need for that, at the crime scene we got a positive ID and…"

Arthur glared up at them.

"I want to see her."

Sara rubbed his back and shook her head.

"Honey, the funeral home is going to take her in another day, let them take care of it. Trust me, she wouldn't have wanted you to see her life this."

Arthur stared down at his shoes before the police officers got up, offering their hands to Sara and Bettina before giving their cards. After they left Arthur broke down crying again.

_**Later…**_

"She needs to wear something for the funeral…right?"

Sara and Bettina looked at each other as Arthur sat across from them staring down at the same cup of coffee he had for the last hour or so.

"Yes, I'm going next door to pick something out for her later tonight. The police said it's okay but we should stay out for the rest of the weekend. I'll grab you some clothes and your suit."

Arthur shook his head.

"Let me do it."

He looked up at the two women before Sara shook her head again.

"No honey, you shouldn't go back there alone…you need to get some rest, the next couple of days are going to be busy and hard on you."

"I want to do this, please…I know what she would like, please."

Sara thought about it for a second before deeply sighing.

"Okay honey, let's go."

_**A half an hour later…**_

There was police tape on the inside of the door which had been cut. Sara said the officers mentioned that some people would be coming in and out of the house for the next two days. Going in, somehow things seemed so different.

This had been their home.

Arthur stood on the porch for a moment and couldn't seem to move.

The porch had hanging wind chimes which Regan had bought, all of them gently clinking together as another warm breeze blew by. He looked over at the wicker furniture and the table Regan had been working on which it's surface was completely made out of sea glass. He saw the hanging porch swing, and the old umbrella stand. Looking down at the worn 'Welcome' mat, he gulped and walked behind Sara.

Inside things smelled the same, yet was different. He listened to Sara's shoes clicking against the hardwood floor and looked into the living room. The table had been turned the right way and all the broken figures and frames had been thrown out. Sara stood on the landing as Arthur eyed the living room better.

The photographs of himself and Regan were stacked on a neat pile on the coffee table. Looking into that room his heart ached.

Is none of this would have happened he could see Regan curled up on the couch working with himself beside her writing his paper on his laptop.

"I'll go upstairs, you just stay down here."

"No."

Arthur shook his head and took hold of the wooden railing.

"Let's go."

"Honey, I'm sure they cleaned everything up but I don't think…"

Arthur ignored her and went up the stairs quickly, finally he was in the hallway and for a second he got tunnel vision. Sara was behind him as he took a second and looked down the hallway.

For a brief second he had a flash of Regan laying there.

Now the long throw rug that had once been there was gone. The flat table which held one of Regan's vases was pushed further down as well. The hardwood floor was spotless and there wasn't any blood splatter on the wallpaper.

It looked as if nothing had even happened.

Walking forward, he stopped for a second and knew that in this exact spot was where he had found her.

It took a second for him to really wrap his mind around it. In this exact spot some bastard had thrown her down to the ground, grabbed her by the ankles and had violently raped and murdered her. For a brief moment he could see her staring up at the ceiling, a single tear falling from her eyes as she choked to death on her own blood.

"Arthur are you okay?"

Arthur was woken from his trance by Sara before nodding.

Walking further he went into the bedroom. Standing there he didn't exact know what to do. The bed was still halfway unmade. Just two nights ago they had slept in that bed together. Looking around there was so much of Regan around him he didn't think he could stand it. Taking a second he sighed and cleared his throat.

"Mind getting my suit jacket, it's hanging up in the spare bedroom closet."

Sara watched him closely before nodding.

"All right hun."

He waited until he heard her walking down the hall before standing and feeling completely heartbroken.

He walked over to their bed and ran his hand over their plush comforter. Sighing he sat down for a second and knew he would have to go into her closet and pick out the clothes she would be buried in. The thought of her being buried underground, molding in a coffin made him sick. Shutting his eyes he sighed loudly trying to control his tears.

"My wife is dead."

He said out loud in the silence of the room.

Reality had finally hit him.

Yesterday his beautiful wife had been raped and killed in their home. He was in his mid-twenties and now a widow. His wife had been killed, and he would never see her again.

Looking at her nightstand he bit his bottom lip from not breaking down.

There was her lamp which was shut off, her I-pod which she used as an alarm, a set of cheap earrings she had worn a few days earlier.

Sighing he stared at them before noticing the top draw of her nightstand was open slightly. Raising an eyebrow, he pulled it open and saw two things that made everything around him stop.

Reaching in he pulled both of them out.

He stared at the first object puzzled before opening the card. He read it over and over and over again before a second reality hit him.

He looked at the other object in his hand and looked closer.

He felt himself beginning to shake and shoved both objects back into the draw. At that exact moment Sara walked in with his suit jacket draped over her arm.

"You okay?"

Arthur rubbed the back of his neck and knew it was going to be hard to control his words.

"Sara, after this can you take me to the hospital where they took her."

Sara sighed.

"Arthur…"

"Please, I have to ask the doctor's a very important question…please."

Sara looked at him closely before nodding.

"Of course we can."

Arthur eyed the nightstand and prayed to God he was wrong.


	4. Chapter 4

"Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever. Let us pray."

Arthur sat dressed in his three piece suit which seemed ten times bigger on him, he knew he hadn't been eating much these past couple of days, but nothing seemed to fit him the same way. In fact Sara had commented that she was planning on making a nice home cooked dinner with Bettina for him after all this so he wouldn't look like a walking skeleton.

Sitting there, he stared at the white casket which had beautiful fire lilies laid on it. Fire lilies were Regan's favorite and Sara had found a florist that had grown them early in the season. Arthur had focused on those flowers for what seemed like the entire funeral. Now he looked around and saw everyone bowing their heads.

It was a beautiful spring morning, in fact Arthur couldn't believe how beautiful it looked and felt at this exact moment. There weren't any clouds in the sky and the weather was warming up. In the distance as the priest finished his prayer, a bird sang. Sitting there beside Sara he looked at all the faces in the crowd. Mostly they were friends of Regan and himself. Ones who had sent baskets of baked goods, flowers, and fruit to Bettina's house in the last three days. The ones who had come to the viewing yesterday, even though viewing hadn't been exactly the right word since the coffin was indeed closed. Arthur had seen Regan before the viewing and had to admit whoever had worked on her had done a wonderful job.

He had tried to attempt dry humor at Sara when it came to this, saying he wondered if he should tip since they did a good job scrubbing off all the blood and being smart enough to have her wear a silk scarf to cover her throat. Sara instead had sighed and held his arm telling him to take it easy.

Arthur had picked out Regan's robin egg blue dress for her to wear, which was what she wore on their first real date. He had also brought one of her white silk scarf's thinking they maybe could do something with her hair. Sara agreed that was nice. Before the viewing the funeral director brought Arthur Regan's wedding band telling him they had gotten it off for him and wondered if he wanted to keep it or to have her wear it.

Arthur had thought about this and said he wanted it.

Sara had taken care of everything and he honestly didn't know what he would have done without her or Bettina those last couple of days. They had gone out and done everything while he just floated along as if he was in a dream.

The viewing was at a nice funeral home called Marquette's. They were a small family run business in which the inside looked as though everything was from a 1940's lounge. They were more than helpful though and very kind to Arthur.

Sara had picked out everything and when he arrived the morning of the viewing still in a complete daze, he was very pleased with how everything came out. He remembered the few morbid talks Regan and him used to have when they were just laying around passing the time. One was their dream funeral. Regan said she wanted The Smiths, there is a light that never goes out to play. She wanted to be cremated but to be dressed in a blouse and blue jeans. She wanted her ashes scattered anywhere special that someone could think of, more than likely the park where she had met him.

Arthur remembered smiling when she asked what his would be. Nuzzling in close he shrugged.

"Well I'm planning on dying the same day as you so that sounds perfect."

Now here he was, he knew this wasn't exactly what Regan would have wanted but he was completely unable to make decisions right now. Funerals and death weren't a playful subject anymore, it was now reality. Someone had broken into their house and raped and murdered her. There was no glory in death, in fact it was just plain ugly.

Bettina's cousin, a doctor from a couple of towns over had come over the night before with some pills he had, Arthur had overheard him tell her to keep a close eye on them but to give him any if he felt a panic attack coming on. He also had come that morning before the viewing, a complete stranger and had injected him with something. Arthur remembered this was before he had gotten dressed and couldn't be bothered nor feel the pain of the needle going in. Instead he sat there staring off into space. He knew if it wasn't for that needle, he wouldn't have gotten through the viewing.

He had been able to look at his wife alone before everyone came in for the morning viewing. Bettina, her cousin, and Sara waited outside as he drifted towards the casket which was surrounded by what seemed like millions of flowers that had been sent by distant friends and family. He remembered how out of it he felt and how the smell of the flowers seemed over powering. He stood there looking down at her and felt nothing.

The upper half of the coffin was open and she laid there as if she was sleeping. Her hair was done nicely and fell to her shoulders. Her face was done up nicely, and her lips a light pink. Her hands were folded and the scarf carefully placed and tied around her neck. There were flower petals around her.

"She's sleeping…"

He thought to himself before slowly kneeling down.

Leaning in close his face crumbled as silent tears rolled down his face.

It wasn't fair, Regan was a good girl. He had been her wife and he loved her more than anything. Why would somebody want to shatter his perfect life he had with her.

"Please, let me have her back…I promise I won't let anything happen to her, I promise."

He harshly whispered to himself. More tears fell from his face before he reached into the coffin and touched her cold hand.

"Please don't leave me Regan; I don't know what to do…"

He said through his tears. Lowering his head he sobbed as his shoulders arched. He hated this, he hated that his wife had been killed, and that he was all alone. Taking a second, he finally looked up at her and sniffled.

He did believe in God, but didn't understand why he had taken her. Looking at her beautiful face and feeling her cold hand he sighed loudly.

"Why didn't you tell me baby?"

He asked her. Lowering his head again he cried until finally Sara entered the room and told him people were beginning to arrive.

The viewing had been long and empty for him. So many of his classmates and friends had gone. He greeted them standing near the closed coffin. They all either shook his hand or hugged him.

"I'm so sorry Arthur."

"She was beautiful, she's in heaven now looking down at you."

"She's an angel now."

"I hope they catch that bastard."

"If there's anything you need."

"I'm so sorry Arthur, she was so beautiful and she loved you so much."

"Thank-God it was quick, at least she didn't suffer."

This last comment had stunned Arthur, it was said at least twice by distant friends of his from college. He knew there had been a brief article in the paper about what had happened, in which he hadn't read. He knew the article hadn't gone into detail, but he still said it enough.

Everyone knew Regan had been murdered, and some knew she had been raped.

He wanted to scream to them that some bastard had broken into their home and had attacked her. Some man had chased her and threw her down on the ground before yanking her legs apart and breaking apart her tights. Some man forced himself into her and then stabbed her before slitting her throat. Some man had watched her die and had enjoyed it.

He knew it hadn't been quick, in fact it must have been a lifetime for his poor wife who more than likely was laying in the hallway when this was happening to her and wondering where her husband was.

He hadn't been there to protect her and now she was dead.

Instead he just thanked them and hugged them back with little to do effort.

Around two in the afternoon his adopted parents had arrived.

Sara had quickly gone to him asking if he wanted to go outside for some air. Arthur watched the couple in their mid to late fifties all dressed in black slowly make their way over to him and shook his head. He hadn't seen these two in years and honestly couldn't believe they were here now.

Finally they stood in front of him, both looking older than usual.

He knew that the two of them had a son together when they were very young. He died when he was seventeen and since then they hadn't ever been the same. A few years later they had adopted Arthur and it wasn't until he was in high school that he knew something was wrong.

"Arthur, I'm so sorry…"

The man who had adopted him, the same man with the fragile features with thinning hair reached over and hugged him. The hug was hard and Arthur felt himself get squeezed against his body. The smell of flowers, cologne, and cigars seemed over powering.

Arthur thought back on his brief time with these people. They were middle aged when they adopted him, but had all ready lived long lives. The two of them had been teenagers when they had their own son, and his death made them empty shells of the people they once were. He would forever be thankful for how good they were to him, for a few years he did live a normal childhood in a nice neighborhood and felt completely comfortable until…

He shut his eyes and felt his hand begin to move up between them, towards his thigh. He remembered all those times, mostly after he hit puberty. He remembered how the touching began happening more and more often until finally, he saw that nobody was going to help him but himself.

So he ran.

He thought he was finally done with them, he had tried to build distance and live his own life, but these two sick people didn't seem to ever want to go away. He knew Sara believed him, and had stuck up for him when he broke away. Besides that, only Regan had known…

When his hand got close to his crotch, Arthur's face crumpled and he shoved him away.

"Get away from me you sick bastard."

"Arthur!"

He heard, instead he just glared at the man he once thought of as a father.

Turning around, he left the room while everyone stood in complete silence. Sara was the only one who followed. The two of them sat in the back room together; Arthur had to get his breathing under control while Sara gently rubbed his back and promised him he never had to see them again. Time passed and finally it was time for lunch. Bettina took them to a small pub a few blocks down, a pub that he had driven by thousands of time and never thought he would be spending the afternoon in-between his wife's wake there.

He barely touched his food, instead he just stared ahead saying little to nothing. Right before it was time to go he looked up, his eyes raw from crying.

"She was pregnant."

Those three words hung in the air for a good minute before Bettina and Sara finally let it sink in long enough to process.

"What?"

Arthur felt ashamed and twisted his hands together underneath the table.

"Regan, she was pregnant, she was ten weeks…it was a baby girl."

Arthur saw Bettina's eyes drift down to her coffee mug; she was stunned and had to take a second to think. Sara on the other hand looked heartbroken. Looking over at Arthur she shook her head.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry…"

She attempted in hugging him but he stayed as stiff as a rock, sitting there he stared ahead. He knew if he didn't say any of this out loud he never would. He needed to say something, most of all now.

"She hadn't told me yet, we weren't trying or anything…but she did have that ovary problem a few months back. I found a pregnancy test and a card that was meant for me…she was going to surprise me this past weekend."

"Did you know for sure?"

Arthur nodded.

"I asked the hospital, she was pregnant…she was p-pregnant and was g-gonna have a little g-g-girl…"

His words completely broke apart as he looked down at the table, trying his hardest to keep himself together he blinked passed the tears and looked at the two older women.

"Robin…I used to say if we ever had a little girl I wanted to name her Robin."

The rest Arthur couldn't say, instead he just lowered his head and cried. Sara and Bettina stared at each other, not knowing exactly what to say or so. They stayed that way letting him cry until finally Sara put her arm around him, giving the little comfort she could give.

By the time the second viewing came around Arthur had gotten himself together. His adopted parents hadn't returned and less people showed up. Most of them friends of Arthur's who hugged him and offered any help they could give. A few police officers arrived as well dressed in suits and looking strangely out of place. They took Arthur aside saying how sorry they were and that there still hadn't been any leads.

Arthur sat in the back the rest of the time before Sara and Bettina drove him home. Arriving at Bettina's, her cousin met them there and they all sat together having coffee in silence. Arthur didn't want to speak nor eat, all he wanted was so fall asleep and escape this horrible pain that never seemed to go away.

He couldn't believe it had been days since Regan had been killed. That it felt like a lifetime and he honestly didn't know how much longer he could keep going without her. Bettina's cousin gave him something to sleep and he dressed alone in the spare bedroom and closed his eyes. Tomorrow was the funeral. Tomorrow was the day they were going to bury his wife and child and he would never see Regan's beautiful face again.

He wondered when Regan was going to tell him about the pregnancy. He had read over the card which was baby blue with two baby owls on it. Inside Regan had wrote in her tiny handwriting that she couldn't wait to meet her daddy and that she was real excited to be part of their life's soon. Arthur knew this was Regan's cute way of telling him about the baby, and that he knew she more than likely would have surprised him this past weekend with the card and test.

He hadn't really thought of kids, they were still pretty young…but still he knew the moment Regan would have handed him that pregnancy test his eyes would have lit up and he would have been the happiest man in the world.

He changed into the clothes Sara had brought over and pulled up the covers, he laid there in the darkness and a silent tear rolled down his face.

He didn't understand why this was happening.

Closing his eyes he began to dream he was next door at his house. It was a beautiful evening and he was on the back deck watching the sun set, the sky a beautiful orange red color. He was leaning against the railing which over looked their backyard and pool and felt perfectly happy.

"Beautiful isn't it?"

He looked and Regan stood there clear as day, her eyes sparking in the red glow the sky casted against them. Standing beside him she smiled and Arthur felt his heart swell up. Grabbing hold of her arms he smiled. She stared up at him with her lovely eyes and smiled back. That's when he knew he had to hold onto her. That the past couple of days were just a horrible nightmare and that he would finally wake up. He knew if he didn't hold onto her he would lose her.

"Regan! Please don't die! I need you! Please don't die, just stay with me a little longer! Please!"

He began to cry, holding onto her before he smiled, slightly cocking her head to the side.

That's when Arthur woke up.

Gasping for breath, he shot up and sat upward in the darkness. For a brief second he didn't know exactly where he was and felt his heart racing in his chest. That's when reality came to him along with the memory of his dream.

Regan was dead.

Putting his head in his hands, he began to cry.

Now here he was, the following day and sitting by his wife's closed casket before they were about to bury her and their unborn baby. Sitting there that beautiful morning, surrounded by distant friends and family, he felt completely alone.

Earlier, before they left the funeral home he had been able to say goodbye to her. Bettina and Sara waited outside as he knelt beside the coffin and looked at her. At this exact moment she appeared to just be sleeping. Staring at her, tears began to blur his vision. Reaching over, he brushed back her bangs and felt her cold skin.

"Oh baby, you're so beautiful…"

He felt his heart aching.

Bowing his head, his insides shook before he sniffled in.

"Why didn't you tell me Regan? Why didn't you tell me right away?"

But then again he didn't know if he would have even noticed. For the last few days he had been kicking himself for not seeing any signs before everything happened. Regan had not only been his wife, but his best friend. Surly he could of seen something. Why hadn't he noticed she hadn't been getting her period? Why hadn't he noticed her having any morning sickness? He knew she would have told him, even if this was completely unexpected. They had only brought up children a few times, mostly after her ovary scare. Both had decided they wanted kids, even one at least…but decided to wait until they were in their mid thirties at least before starting to try. He remembered them talking about this and how he had rolled on top of her grinning, saying how much fun it would be to try.

Since then there hadn't really been any further thought put into it. Now here laid his beautiful murdered wife, who had been killed for no reason at all. Just for a little under a thousand dollars in jewelry and an old stereo. He knew what that bastard had done to her, and had forced the doctors that were looking Regan over show him the chart when he came to ask about the pregnancy.

One of the stab marks had been in the stomach. Arthur remembered feeling sick when he heard this.

He knew what that meant…

Before anything happened to Regan she had begged for her unborn baby's life.

Kneeling there, felt his wedding band along with hers in his pocket. He needed to just feel the coldness of the metal against his fingers for a moment. In some strange way they brought comfort. Looking at Regan he felt tears roll down his face. Leaning over, he kissed her cold lips before a darkness swept over his eyes.

"I promise I'll find them baby…I promise."

Now here he sat, alone and thinking of her.

A few people from the university had come to the funeral, he heard them earlier telling Sara how impressed they were by his dream research and how promising his ideas seemed. As of this very moment, it seemed like a waste.

Arthur couldn't count how many times he would do tests with Regan, usually checking her blood pressure and heart beat whenever she took naps. He remembered how often she would wake with the happiest look on her face and just smile up at him.

He stared at the coffin and felt himself beginning to get lost. Inside that coffin was his wife and baby.

His family…

Bowing his head, he held back his tears.


	5. Chapter 5

_**One week later…**_

"It doesn't seem right…"

Arthur found himself standing on the front porch of his house one late afternoon shortly before dusk. Standing there in jeans and a T-shirt, he had his hands shoved in his pockets and listened to Bettina who stood on the steps looking uneasy.

Arthur sighed and took one of his hands and ran it through his hair, he wanted to just take a nice warm shower and fall asleep. The last week had been exhausting and in all honestly, he couldn't wait to fall asleep again and see her.

"It's been long enough, I need to start picking up the pieces and get my life in order, I can't stay in your guest bedroom forever…"

"But you could, you're no trouble at all honey. It's just me and my cats next door…you shouldn't come back here, you've been through too much and you're still grieving…"

"Bettina, I'll be honest with you. I'm hurting, I'm hurting real bad…but I need to join the human race again, Regan would have wanted me to."

"Of course she would have, but honey it's hasn't been that long. You don't really have anybody, you should be around people."

"What I need is some time alone believe it or not. I just need to wrap my head around everything and take things one day at a time. Some might think it's not healthy to go back here, mostly because of what happened but I need to feel her around me a little Bettina, I miss her like hell and I think it will make me feel better."

Bettina studied his face closely.

"You're not going to do anything stupid are you?"

Arthur gave a dry humorless laugh before shaking his head.

"I just need a week to myself before I go back to class, I'll be fine."

Bettina still looked unsure before shaking her head.

"Well I'm checking up on you later tonight if you like it or not. I'll be doing so for some time…I adored you and Regan, and I'm sure she would want me to keep an eye out for you.."

Arthur nodded, wanting to just go back inside and escape everything. Sara had left a day earlier and before her taxi arrived to drive her to the airport she had clung to him tightly and told him she would keep in touch. She wiped her tears away before touching Arthur's face and smiling.

"You were her whole world Arthur…"

This comment made Arthur sick simply because he knew it was true. Regan had always remarked how perfectly they had fit together, and how she would follow him wherever he wanted to go, as long as they were together. Now standing here, he felt completely alone; in fact he couldn't believe that less than fifteen days ago his life was going perfectly fine. He was in his own little world with his wife, and he never expected such a horrible thing to happen.

Now he understood he would have to deal with this every single day for the rest of his life.

He now needed to go back home, he had to figure out some way in dealing with this and as crazy as it sounded, he felt he needed to be alone. Last week after the funeral, when everyone was walking back to his cars he finally had reality hit him again so hard his knees almost buckled.

Regan had been murdered.

He had waited until they got into the car when he broke down, crying his eyes out he loudly moaned as hunched over as Sara held him, telling him everything would be all right. That evening they thought it would be best if nobody stopped by Bettina's. Instead Arthur was given another shot and sat in the living room completely dazed.

Fruit baskets, flowers, and pies were all send to the house, but Arthur didn't look at any of them. Instead he just sat there staring off into space, trying to remember every single beautiful detail of his wife's face. That night he dreamed of her again.

She was walking down the path in the park where they had first met, it was autumn and trees appeared to be on fire. Leafs fall around them as she walked ahead of him backwards, smiling while her boots clicked against the ground.

He had cried privately to himself, and mostly just slept as the days passed. He didn't want to see anymore nor deal with them. Instead he just stayed at Bettina's and took each day slowly, waiting to just fall back asleep. Now he knew he needed to get himself together, that would be the only way he could keep himself from losing his mind. Standing there as the sun set, he leaned down and hugged Bettina, thanking her so much for all her help. When he pulled away he saw she was crying.

"Oh honey, I'm so sorry…"

Bettina told him she would be by later on that night and if there was anything, anything at all no matter what time it was she was just next door. Hugging her again, he turned and went inside his house. Breathing a sigh of relief when he was able to shut the door behind him. Standing there in the darkness, he took in the faint stale scent of all the candles Regan had collected and how on so many different days the air in their house seemed so sweet and different. Today it smelled like apple pies baking. Leaning against the door he waited, looking around and eyeing the living room where the setting sunlight poured through the windows.

He stared at the table, and everything around.

Regan had gotten him into artwork when they had just began dating. Never before had he really taken any further interest until he met her. For the brief time they had been together they had begun collecting together at all galleries around the city and were building up a pretty impressive collection. Looking at the framed paintings he eyed the stairwell and how still and different everything now seemed.

"Regan? I'm h-h-ome…"

He choked out as a silent tear rolled down his face. Taking a second he waited for her to appear at any second, smiling and greeting him at the door with a T-shirt and shorts on. He couldn't even count how many times she had greeted him the second he walked through the door with a smile on her face.

Now nobody was there to welcome him.

Wiping his face quickly he wanted to scold himself. Instead his heart throbbed in his chest as he slowly walked into the living room. Sighing he stared at the table, the same table which had been knocked over when whoever had broken in had chased Regan around. Standing there he saw that Regan's figures must have been thrown out since they had been smashed to bits, the hardwood floor had been swept, and all that now laid there were the few photographs which had been taken out of the broken frames. Last Christmas Regan had bought him a camera; photography had been something he enjoyed as a hobby but never took too seriously. He remembered unwrapping it and smiling before looking up at her and laughing. That morning she sat across from him Indian style drinking a cup of coffee. He remembered her smiling and telling him they needed more photos together anyways.

The first photo Arthur looked at was their wedding photo. This had been taken in autumn, the two of them leaning against each other by a tree at dusk. Arthur remembered how beautiful an evening that had been and gently touched the photograph with his fingertips before going to the next one.

It was of them together, taken just a few months ago when Sara was visiting. It was the two of them smiling with their arms around each other on the porch swing, behind them it was raining. Arthur remembered this day clearly as well, sighing he went to the next photo which was one he had taken. It was Regan standing beside the pool in a two piece red bathing suit. She had huge oversized sunglasses on and had her hands on the hips of her shorts she was wearing. Clearly in the photography you could tell she had just gotten out of the pool and was dripping wet. She was smiling and never looked so beautiful before.

Arthur remembered taking this photo and how he had called out to her and how she had posed, hands on her hips and smiling. This had been taken last summer, and it was Arthur's favorite photo of her…

Setting it down he looked around the living room which was beginning to darken. Walking over to the curtains, he glanced out and looked at the street. The sun was almost done.

Shutting the curtains, he turned on a few lamps and sighed standing in the middle of the room not knowing exactly what to do next. Looking at the couch he remembered how usually she would sprawl out with her sketch books or lap top and just work while he sat beside her writing papers and watching TV. He remembered how just this past spring how they had taken all the furniture out and painted the room, wearing torn T-shirts and jeans. He remembered them getting into a paint fight, and how hard they had laughed after seeing what kind of mess they had made.

He remembered how many times they had sat in the leather chair by the bookshelf, usually making love. He couldn't remember how many times he sat there, tilting his head back and moaning as she climbed up on his lap. How her hands would go up his shirts and vests, palms rubbing against his chest as he dully thrusted into her.

Thinking back, he almost knew exactly when the baby Regan had gotten pregnant with was conceived.

It was three months ago, one week, and eight days ago to be exact. When Arthur first asked the hospital whenever or not if Regan had indeed been pregnant, they had estimated by the size of the fetus inside of her, that she was roughly that along in the pregnancy at the time of her death. They of course weren't as exact as Arthur, but searching back enough in his memory, he now knew for sure when it had happened.

It was the beginning of March, it had been a Saturday and for half the morning Arthur had been on the back deck studying. The weather had just begun getting warmer and any chance he got; Arthur would sit out for a few hours and usually be able to focus better when he had fresh air. He remembered deciding to go inside grab a cold beer. Whenever he was getting close to the end of his long study periods at home, he would crack open a beer or so and read for a little while before finding what Regan was up to.

That day when he entered the kitchen, Regan was in jeans and a T-shirt humming and making something at the stove. Watching for her a second, Arthur couldn't help but smile. She had her back turned towards him and had a mixing bowl in her hands. She was humming and looked beautiful. A forest green scarf was tied in her hair and the black T-shirt she was wearing was an old band T-shirt that was his. Smiling, he stood in the open doorway that lead to the deck and leaned there smiling.

Walking behind her, he slipped his hands around her waist and took a deep breath of her perfume. Regan jumped of course, and almost dropped her bowl. Laughing, she jumped up against his body.

"You scared me."

"Sorry…"

He smiled, nuzzling against her neck.

Regan smiled before setting the bowl down and wiping her hands on the front of her jeans.

"I'm attempting to make cookies for us, thought it would be nice for tonight."

"Tonight?"

"I rented a video, I thought we could curl up, relax…"

He smiled.

"What did you rent?"

"Friday the 13th, thought we could watch something scary and I'll have you to protect me."

Arthur laughed.

"Sounds nice…"

Putting her finger into the bowl, she scooped up some of the oatmeal batter and reached behind herself slightly, putting her finger up so he could try some. Smiling, he licked the batter off her finger.

"Mmmm, tastes good."

"I hope so…"

Laughing, his hands raised up underneath the scoops of her breasts and began to rub.

"Come upstairs…"

Smiling, she allowed him to kiss her earlobes. Tilting her head back she closed her eyes as he began to slowly kiss her collar bone. Turning, Regan slipped out of his arms and smiled at him. Reaching forward, she kissed him quickly before standing back against the counter, his arms on each side of her.

Reaching forward, her hands found his belt and began to undo it. Raising an eyebrow, Arthur smiled.

"Here?"

Regan laughed before she began to tug his belt off, reaching in she yanked down his zipper. Looking down at himself, Arthur couldn't believe the massive erection he was getting. Watching her, he saw her undo her jeans and slowly and in a very teasing manner began to pull them down.

A few minutes later she sat on the edge of their kitchen table, which was usually littered in mail and work, along with newspapers and books. Sitting there, she laughed before leaning back as he approached. Stepping over her discarded jeans, he allowed his pants to fall around his ankles before he held onto the table and began to position himself.

Their faces just mere inches away from each other, he teased her with a smile before covering her mouth with his. Kissing him deeply, she sighed and laid down before he slowly kissed her neck and moved his way down between her breasts. Running her hands through his hair, she cupped his face making him look straight into his eyes.

Both smiled at the exact time and now looking back on it, Arthur knew that at that exact moment they knew something special was going to happen. He couldn't explain it, but now Arthur knew it was fate trying it's hardest to show them that things were going to be different after this, even though the two had made love thousands of times in their one year of being married so far. Holding her leg slightly up, he worked his way in-between her legs before dully pushing in. She gasped a little, looking up at him and for moment Arthur honestly didn't think he could do this, laughing he slid back out.

"Maybe the kitchen table wasn't such a great idea…"

She smiled at him and looked up at the ceiling.

"Bedroom it is?"

Leaning forward and touching his nose with hers he smiled.

"Naw, I think I got a better idea…"

Arthur now, standing alone in his darkling bedroom looked at the same exact chair he was almost positive he had conceived the baby Regan had died with. It was his leather chair, the same one they had made love in constantly. The same chair that had belonged to him and the same one he would often sit in and read some evenings or watch Regan sketch in.

He remembered how perfect it had been, how slow and intense. He remembered how that's how they spent most of the afternoon before finally it had happened. He had locked eyes with Regan at that exact moment, unaware that nearly three months from that exact moment he would be staring at where him and his wife were making love and wondering if she had been all ready dead when the man who had murdered her raped her in their upstairs hallway. Looking at the chair a single tear rolled down his face as he walked over and touched the arm of it.

He remembered he had roughly finished, and collapsed backwards into the chair, sinking into the cushions as he attempted to get his breathing under control. Regan sat straddled on his lap and laid against his chest, softly kissing it. Wrapping his arms around her tightly, he honestly didn't want to let her go. Kissing the top of her head, he took in her lovely perfume scent and told her he loved her.

Completely unaware that they had just made a child together.

The rest of that certain evening had been a blur. Arthur remembered the batter from the cookies by then had been hard, and both had cleaned out the bowls in the kitchen laughing before ordering a pizza. Together they curled up on the couch watching the movie, laughing and laying against each other enjoying each other's company.

It was just one of those certain times he spent with her that wasn't anything special, yet stood out to him.

Sighing, he turned on some more lamps and looked around the room once more. Walking into the dark kitchen, he saw that Bettina had brought over all the food people had been sending. Arthur honestly hadn't seen so many fruit baskets before in his entire life. Not even the slightly bit hungry, he turned around.

He knew what he wanted and simply sighed before rubbing the back of his deck and starting for the stairs.

Pausing, he remembered the throw rug and how it had looked when he came home the day he found her. Feeling a little sick to his stomach, he switched on yet another light and looked at the hanging photos and artwork.

Making his way up the stairs he knew he really shouldn't have been alone. Reaching the top of the staircase he turned and stood at the end of the hallway. Quickly he switched the light on and almost expected to see a flash in his mind like that scene in The Shinning. He could see Regan laying there in a pool of blood which had splattered everywhere.

Instead he saw bare hallway, no signs of blood or Regan, or anything. Standing there, he looked at the same exact spot where he had found her and felt his hands slowly begin to shake. She had been raped, stabbed, and murdered.

He could almost see her in his mind screaming, running down the hallway to maybe attempt to lock herself in one of the bedrooms and how whoever this dark figure with no face was grabbed her by the hair, slamming her down hard against the floor. He could see her struggling, screaming and crying out as she wiggled and slapped and kicked. He could see in his mind the man hitting her hard, almost enough to knock her out before holding the knife to her throat.

"Please! Don't hurt me! I'm pregnant, please!"

But the man wasn't listening, instead he could just hear the bastard tell her to open her legs, that he was going to fuck her and not to scream out or he would kill her. He could hear Regan's cries, and her half attempts to try and get away.

He could see the man ripping her tights and screaming at her to lay still. He could see that bastard on top of her and could almost see Regan's tear filled eyes almost roll back into their head before seeing the grandfather clock just a few feet away.

He knew at some point she must have looked up and wondered where he was? Why wasn't he home yet, and why wasn't he stopping this from happening?

He knew whenever it had happened, whoever long it had been she had begged for their unborn baby's life, and how just to spite her, the man who did this shoved his knife right into her stomach.

The doctor's said more than likely she would have begun to internally bleed and that even if she had lived, she more than likely would have miscarried. Whoever had done this not only had murdered his wife, but his child too.

Squatting down, Arthur touched the floor which had been buffed and waxed, and scrubbed clean. Feeling sick he looked around the hallway before getting up and going into his bedroom. Kicking the door closed behind him, he knew he needed some sleep. He had told Bettina earlier that he would keep his cell phone on and that he just wanted to take a nap and if she was coming over to call him first. Undoing his jeans, he kicked them off and pulled his T-shirt off as well. Grabbing them, he folded them quickly and tossed them on a small fainting sofa near Regan's vanity. Sighing, he rubbed his face and knew he needed to shave. Looking out the window, he saw it was nearly dark and that twenty or so miles away his wife laid in the darkness of her own coffin, cold and alone.

Switching on the light on her side of the bed, he laid down and grabbed a pillow. Breathing in her scent, he felt himself beginning to cry. Laying there, he rolled over and opened the nightstand draw before taking out the card.

Opening it, he read it over and over again until his eyes hurt.

He was going to be a father…

Folding the card and putting it away, he turned over, hugging her pillow and shut his eyes. He just wanted the pain to stop, just for one second…

_Arthur…_

_Arthur opened his eyes and found himself laying in bed, the pillow still in his arms. Blinking, he glanced over at the clock radio and saw it was blinking 12:00 over and over again. The power must have gone out since the lights were off as well. Looking at the window he saw it was darker out as well._

_Reaching for his cell, he saw it wasn't there. Knowing he probably left it downstairs; he blinked a few times before getting out of bed and running his hands through his hair. He wanted to shower. Taking a second he reached for the lamp and remembered the power had gone out._

"_Fuck…"_

_Standing, he crossed the darkened room and opened the door before walking out into the hallway._

_That's when he froze._

_Regan sat there, in her dress and tights, her hair fallen in her eyes and her wide beautiful eyes looking up at him._

_She was sitting in a dark almost black puddle of blood._

"_Arthur?"_

_Moonlight spilled in through the stained glass window at the other end of the hallway against her milky skin. She sat there with blood splattered against her arms and face, silent tears rolling down from her eyes as she stared up at him. Arthur took everything inside of him from not screaming. Instead he just leaned against the doorway, his eyes wide and terrified._

"_R-Regan? You're d-dead…"_

"_Arthur…"_

_She slowly rose up, her bare feet leaving bloody footprints from the blood as she approached him. Staring at him, he really saw up close what that bastard had done to her and he shivered._

"_Regan?"_

_He cried out as she leaned in close, her lips a now purple blue color._

"_Arthur, listen to me very carefully…"_

_She pressed up against him and he felt how cold she was. Closing his eyes, he held back from breaking down. She touched him with her freezing bloody hands before pointing to the small vent that was in the hallway near the floor._

"_You need to look closer…_

_Arthur looked and then looked back down at her, his chest was racing as she sadly smiled at him._

"_Oh Arthur…I just want you to be happy…"_

Arthur woke up.

His eyes slowly opening, he stared up at the ceiling and saw the lights were back on. Taking a second he looked over and saw it was a little after 9. The power was on, and it had been a dream. Quickly he touched his face and saw he had been crying, wiping the tears away he blinked again and checked his cell phone which was on his nightstand.

Just then the doorbell rang.

Arthur eyed the clock again, he knew if it was Bettina she would have called first. Sitting up he quickly grabbed his jeans and T-shirt and pulled them on. By the time he was walking down the hallway the bell rang again. Eyeing the floor, the memory of the dream was still clear. Feeling a little sick, he quickly hurried down the stairs and to the front door.

When he answered the door it took a second for him to figure out who exactly he was looking at. The porch lights were on, but after meeting so many distant friends and family within the last week he couldn't exactly pin-point who this was. Finally it hit him.

"Dr. Swann?"

Dr. Swann, Philip Swann had been Regan's doctor. Her gynecologist to be exact, Regan had been seeing him for nearly two years since she did a lot of switching around and felt comfortable with him. He was a handsome man in his late 40's, whose own wife had passed away from cancer seven years before hand. He was kind, and always welcomed Arthur with a firm handshake.

Arthur got to know Dr. Swann pretty well several months ago when Regan had her ovary problem. He remembered coming home from class one afternoon last fall and how he had brought them home two cups of coffee. He remembered what a beautiful crisp afternoon it was and how he wanted to take her out to dinner that night.

He had come home, kicking the door closed and calling out to her.

That's when he heard her moan and he froze. Quickly setting the coffee down, he threw his messenger bag down and hurried into the kitchen.

"Regan? Regan!"

Right away panic entered him before he stopped in the doorway of the kitchen. She was hunched over on the floor holding her stomach.

"Jesus!"

He nearly fell as he skidded over and dropped to his knees, grabbing her.

"What is it?"

Regan looked at him with tears in her eyes.

"Call 911, something is wrong…ah!"

She cried out, burying her head against his chest. Scared to death, he held her before digging into his pocket.

"What's wrong baby? What happened?"

"It just started a few minutes ago, it hurts…"

"Where honey?"

"My stomach, oh god!"

She nearly screamed, holding her tight his shaken hands opened his cell and he quickly dialed 911. Right away a woman's voice was on the other line.

"What's your emergency?"

"Hello, I just came home and my wife is in a lot of pain I think something might be wrong…"

"What kind of pain sir?"

"I don't know she says her stomach hurts real bad and she's on the floor…"

"Is she able to talk sir?"

Arthur looked down at Regan, laying in his arms and slowly rocking back and forth, tears of pure pain rolling down her face as she moaned. Terrified, he held the phone closer to himself.

"Please just come here right away! Please!"

He screamed into the phone. The woman on the other line tried to get him to calm down, but all he could tell him was his address before throwing his phone down and holding her. Kissing the top of her head, he tried to tell her everything would be okay, but the truth was he never felt so scared before in his entire life.

The ambulance came eight minutes later, two paramedics hammered on the door and for a second he didn't even want to leave her. She had been lying against him crying out in pain on the kitchen floor. Finally he ran and opened the door for them, tripping over his words and running back to her. He watched in complete panic as they loaded her onto the stretcher and took her away. He hurried along side, holding her hand and telling her everything was going to be okay. By then some of the neighbors had come out along with Bettina.

He rode in the back of the ambulance with her and refused to let go of her hand for even a second. By the time they reached the hospital, he found himself silently praying that nothing would happen to his wife.

At the end of the night Regan had been given something and was fast asleep. Dr. Swann had come into the room along with another doctor and explained to Arthur who sat beside Regan petting her hand that everything seemed to be okay.

Regan had cysts on her ovaries, and they had burst. It didn't seem serious, but she would need surgery by the end of the month…if not the next cyst that burst might send her into toxic shock. They told him the chances of them having children in the future were 50/50 if this wasn't taken care of and if he wanted they could freeze some of her eggs and fertilize them with his sperm. Arthur sat back in complete shock. The year before they had just gotten married. In fact their one year was coming up. Children were the last thing on this mind at that exact moment. All he wanted t know was that his wife would be okay

Dr. Swann patted him on the shoulder and said Regan could go home tomorrow, but they would have to make a decision about the surgery as soon as possible.

That night Arthur curled up beside Regan on the narrow hospital bed and listened to the sound of her breathing.

That morning when they went home they got into a pretty bad argument, an argument he now regretted.

When she had woken up he couldn't have been happier. He smiled and kissed her forehead before she asked where she was. He slowly explained what had happened and a few minutes later the nurse called in Dr. Swann who broke down everything for her. Regan listened and asked if she could go home to think about it. Arthur was a little stunned at this comment; there really wasn't anything to think of. If there was a chance she could get hurt or even die, he wanted her to have the surgery right away. Dr. Swann was very understanding and told her to call him by the end of the week. Nodding, she asked Arthur to help her get dressed.

On the taxi ride back from the hospital he kept looking at her, she didn't seem to want to let go of his hand. By the time they got home, she went to the couch and collapsed. Arthur checked their answering machine and saw that it was completely filled. Mostly by Bettina who was probably a worried wreck. Sighing, he walked over and looked at her.

"You okay?"

Regan looked at him and nodded.

"Yeah, just exhausted. That took a lot out of me.

Arthur sighed.

"So should we call Dr. Swann and see when we can get you in for surgery?"

Regan looked at him and bit the bottom of her lip.

"I not so sure about that…"

Jeffery looked at her.

"What?"

"You heard the doctors…"

"Regan I know you hate hospitals, but this is serious."

"It's surgery…what if something happens."

"Well something will happen if you don't do anything. You heard the doctors…"

"Arthur…they said if something went wrong they would have to take my entire uterus out…do you know how serious that is?"

"Serious? They said you might die that's serious!"

He found his voice raising. Regan sat up slightly and raised an eyebrow.

"What's the matter with you?"

"What's the matter with me? Regan I thought you were dying yesterday! If there's even the slightly chance something might be wrong I want you to get it fixed! You mean too much to me!"

Regan sighed.

"I know way too many people who go in for simple surgeries and they never come back out…"

"Jesus Regan! It's nothing like that! You heard the doctors!"

Regan shook her head.

"I'm sorry I scared you but I need a chance to think about it…"

"There's nothing to think about!"

Arthur yelled looking down at her.

"What if they really do need to take everything out Arthur? Then what?"

"What do you mean?"

"I won't be able to have a baby…"

"Regan come the fuck on! I love you too much to even care about that! I rather have you around for the rest of my life then a kid! Stop being stupid!"

"Don't call me stupid…"

Arthur sighed and rubbed the back of his neck as he paced back and forth.

"The doctors said there's other things we can do! I don't want to risk something happening to you! You're not the only one who has a say in this!"

Turning, he saw the two now cold coffees on the table and knocked them over. They splashed across the hardwood floor and Regan jumped. Feeling himself get worked up, he took a few deep breaths before her hands were on his shoulders.

"Shhhh…"

Turning, he looked down at her.

"I'm sorry…"

He felt himself about to cry, but held everything inside him from doing so.

"We'll call Dr. Swann tonight, I'll go in right away. I'm sorry…"

"Regan, I don't want you to do anything you don't want to…I…I just was so scared…"

Before he could say another word she went on her tiptoes and kissed him.

That night they called Dr. Swann and two days later she went in for surgery. Arthur wanted to be in there when it happened but they wouldn't allow him. Instead he sat in the waiting room with Bettina and nervously twisted his hands together watching the clock.

While he was waiting it dawned on him that maybe they should have done the things with her eggs. He really hadn't ever thought about kids before, but at that exact moment he knew one day…maybe in another ten or so years he wanted a baby with his wife. He wanted a son or a daughter and he wanted it to be part of them. Sighing, he looked at the clock again and knew none of that mattered.

All he wanted was his wife to be okay.

Finally the doctors came out along with Dr. Swann, both smiling as Arthur shot up.

"She's fine, everything is okay."

"Did you have to…do anything?"

"We removed the cysts and she's in the clear. You can see her in a little bit, she's resting."

Bettina stood up beside him smiling and hugged his side. Arthur grinned and shook Dr. Swann's hands, thanking him for helping his wife. Unknown to any of them that in less than a year from now…his wife would be dead. Cysts weren't the problem, or internally bleeding…it was a man who broke into their home and raped and murdered her.

He was there when she woke up and smiled.

"Hey you…"

"Hey…"

Grabbing her hands he kissed them before nuzzling his head against hers. Not knowing that in six months cysts or no cysts…he would get her pregnant.

Now he stood in his empty home, looking at his wife's doctor.

"Dr. Swann…"

He stepped forward.

"I was driving by the neighborhood and I just wanted to pay my respects, I was held up in the city for the funeral and…"

Arthur shook his head.

"No, it's fine…thanks."

Dr. Swann held his hand tight.

"How have you been?"

"Fine…well okay I guess."

"I'm so sorry Arthur. Regan was a beautiful woman and she was crazy about you. I heard what happened and I hope they catch that bastard."

Arthur hated talking about it, he was getting so sick of crying. Looking down at his bare feet he nodded.

"Thanks, would you like to come in for a cup of coffee or something?"

Dr. Swann waved his hands.

"Oh no, I'm on my way back home…I just wanted to check up on you. I hope we can have lunch sometime…you were honestly one of the sweetest husbands I've ever met."

"Thanks Dr. Swann…"

"Philip please."

Arthur nodded.

"Thanks Philip, you were a great doctor to her…"

He then took a second before sighing deeply, he didn't want him to see him cry. Looking at him he, he knew if he didn't get this off his chest now…he never would.

"She was pregnant."

The words hung in the awkward silence for a moment before Dr. Swann nodded.

"Yes I know, a few days before it happened she came to my office. She said she was going to surprise you."

Arthur felt himself getting worked up, his voice cracking a little he looked down at his shoes again.

"Yeah…"

"Did you see the photos?"

"What photos?"

"The ultrasound photos, she had me do one and print out some photos."

"No, I didn't see them yet, I'm sure their around…"

"I'm so sorry Arthur…"

"She was having a girl wasn't she?"

Dr. Swann nodded.

"Yeah…she was real excited. I'm sorry Arthur, makes you just sick thinking how the world is coming to be. I mean who would want to take that beautiful woman's life? She never hurt anyone? She was so beautiful and sweet…and some sick fuck had to have his way with her and leave her for dead in a hallway like some discarded doll…makes me sick."

It was making Arthur sick as well.

"Well I better go. I hope we can have lunch soon, again I'm so sorry Arthur, she was lovely and you meant the world to her. I'm sure you two would have made great parents."

Arthur didn't think he could take it anymore. Forcing a small smile, he nodded before Dr. Swann patted him on the shoulder and wished him a good night. Waving to him, Arthur quickly closed the door and leaned against it. Struggling to catch his breath he stood alone on his landing and wiped his eyes again.

"Photos…"

He looked up and headed upstairs again to the office they shared. Hurrying down the hallway, he didn't bother to look down before flicking on a light and looking around. Their office was always cluttered, but somehow they were always able to keep track of things. He looked at his desk, which had his laptop and stacks of paper and notes from his dream research laying around.

Glancing at her desk her heart swelled.

Regan had published three children books by the time she died. She wrote her first one her freshmen year of college. It was a small ten paged colorful story of misunderstood monsters who come to Earth to make friends. This got her ten grand up front and a book deal, which was perfect since she was majoring in English. By the time they met and began dating, she was finishing her second book which was a new spin on Snow White. She turned Snow White into a prince, who ran to live with tiny deer and birds in the woods before his princess came to take him back home.

The book she had just finished last summer was a book about robots which want to become real children and be able to have real feelings. This book got her on the best sellers list for three months and a very impressive paycheck which helped them pay off their home.

She had been messing around with a few ideas lately, and most of her sketches were laying around.

Arthur walked over to her desk and sat down. Her purse was there, along with her paperwork and art supplies. Sighing, he knew this was going to kill him each time he had to look at this stuff. Sighing, he bent over and opened her bottom draw.

Right away he saw it.

It was a large envelope with her name and Dr. Swann's office address printed on it. Sighing he honestly didn't know if he wanted to do this, but before he had a chance to think his fingers tore the envelope and he took out the two blackish blue plastic photos and held them up.

His heart broke right away.

He could clearly see the baby, as tiny as it was. It's head was the shape he made out the best. It was a fuzzy little image, but he could still see perfectly what it was. Regan's name was on it along with the date. She had gotten this done two weeks ago.

He looked at the other photo before dropping them on the floor and putting his head in his hands and crying.

Later that night Bettina did come over and force him to eat something. He showed her the photos and she simply sighed and hugged him tight. They sat together in his empty kitchen drinking coffee before Bettina told him she was going to take the photos.

"No…"

"Arthur, it won't do you any good to keep looking at theses. It's just going to break your heart. Come on now."

Arthur looked down at the two photos and sighed, his finger tracing the baby's outline before looking up with bloodshot eyes.

"I miss her Bettina…"

Bettina slid the photos towards her and nodded.

"I know honey, I know."

That night Arthur went to bed and had the same exact dream of Regan in the hallway. Waking up a little before dawn his eyes snapped open and a horrible feeling filled him.

He had to look at something in the vent, Regan was trying to tell him something. Laying there he turned over feeling wet tears against his face. That's when it dawned on him.

Besides the police, himself, Bettina, and Sara…

Nobody knew where he had found Regan's body.

His eyes widened.


	6. Chapter 6

_**2010**_

"Taxi!"

Ariadne stood outside the airport with her suitcase by her feet. She was planning on visiting her sister for a week before returning back to school in Paris. Standing there that beautiful sunny summer day, nothing more could have made that exact moment perfect.

It was over.

For ten straight hours she had seen things that even the wildest dreamer couldn't have even begun to think about. They were ten terrifying, exciting, and very emotional hours that Ariadne was more than relieved to be done with.

Twenty thousand dollars were also now waiting in her bank account.

She had been paid the least out of the team, but at this very moment she knew even if she hadn't been paid at all she would have come out of this job completely content. Cobb was finally able to go home, Fischer was free from his father's guilt, and the others?

Ariadne had a slight sadness wash over her.

She knew she wouldn't ever see them again.

"Top of the morning to you love."

Ariadne turned slightly and saw Eames climbing into a cab. Winking at her, he made her smile before his car pulled away and began heading towards the freeway. Sighing, she watched it disappear before a voice came from behind her.

"That's no way to get a taxi, you'll be waiting here all day."

Turning, Ariadne smiled when she saw Arthur standing there, dressed smartly in one of his suits and his bag thrown over his shoulder. She couldn't exactly explain it, but having worked so close with him for the past several months she had developed what you might call a school girl crush on him. Usually being so busy with school, she hardly had time to make the bar circuit, or go out with her friends to meet guys. At that time in her time nothing relationship wise seemed that important. Looking at him she felt that nervous twisting in her stomach as her heart began to beat faster. She knew so little about him, yet was beyond interested in what were behind those intense dark eyes.

She knew he was mature beyond his years, in fact when she had been dealing with trying to help Cobb and his past, she kept trying to get Arthur involved since he seemed the most level headed of the team. Looking at him she softly smiled and remembered the second level of the dream.

"Quick give me a kiss…"

It had happened so quickly Ariadne couldn't really remember details, she did however smile and understand the meaning behind it after he said it was worth a shot and held back from smiling. That's when she knew behind that moody slick front he put up, he was really just a young guy who did things for kicks. Smelling his cologne as he walked over, she watched as he stuck out his hand and waved.

Just like magic a taxi pulled up. Laughing, Ariadne shook her head.

"Guess I should stick to designing buildings…"

"It takes some practice, where you heading?"

"City…"

"Want to share, I'm going a little further up North."

"Sure…"

Ariadne was relieved to hear this. The honestly truth was she had become attached to these men, and the thought of never seeing nor speaking to them again scared her. She had developed relationships with them and had go through something nobody could really explain.

They had all dreamed together.

She felt thankful she didn't have to return to this now unknown city alone.

Arthur took her suitcase and loaded it into the trunk as she got in. A few minutes later they were on the freeway, sitting side by side as the driver listened to the radio. Nervously, Ariadne played with her totem, rolling the small gold chest piece in-between her fingers. Looking over, Arthur smiled with amusement.

"Trust me, you're awake."

Snapping out of her little daydream, Ariadne looked down at the chest piece and blushed.

"Yeah, guess it's just going to take a little bit for me to fully wake up."

Arthur smirked at her before a song came on the radio. Ariadne had heard it before but didn't exactly know who it was. Right away Arthur smiled and looked down at his hands. Ariadne smiled, she had never seen him like this.

"What?"

"This song, it used to be my wife's favorite. She owned all their records and even had us dance to this at our wedding."

Ariadne was at a loss of words, suddenly her heart sank.

"You're…married?"

Arthur seemed to be listening to the song, a sad smile on his face before he stared down at his hands.

"I was…"

Ariadne remembered asking almost the same exact thing about Cobb, she didn't want to push this any further, but she had to. If it hadn't been for Arthur they honestly would have been trapped in that dream for a lifetime.

"What happened?"

Arthur glanced up at her.

"She passed away."

Ariadne suddenly wanted to slap herself for being so stupid. Biting her bottom lip she couldn't believe someone like Arthur had been married, but then again why not? He was the perfect gentlemen, handsome, smart, and…

Well everything she always dreamed of. She tried to blame the shock value on the fact he seemed so young, Arthur had told her less than a week ago when birthdays were brought up that he wasn't even thirty yet. She forgot his age was it twenty-eight or twenty-nine? Instead of thinking any further she asked the question she knew she would regret.

"May I ask what happened?"

Arthur looked back at his hands and sighed before looking straight ahead.

"She was murdered."

Ariadne couldn't believe what she just heard. Sitting there she tried to think of a proper reaction, instead she simply sat there and felt the worst overwhelming feeling of grief for Arthur. Unlike Cobb he had been able to keep this horrible pain locked away in his heart. Not once when they were dreaming did she sense anything off, nor see the lack of control Cobb suffered from. Here was a young man who appeared to be carrying a horrible amount of guilt and pain with him, something he had locked far away in his mind so it wouldn't haunt him or harm others.

"Yeah, that's kinda how Cobb and me met after everything happened. I guess that's how we became such good friends…we have more in common than some people know."

Ariadne looked at him and saw for the first time pure emotion behind those dark eyes.

"Did…the police find whoever did it?"

Arthur looked down again and shook his head before looking over at her.

"No, they didn't…but I did."

_**2007**_

Arthur couldn't sleep.

He had paced back and forth in his bedroom nervously biting his nails, trying his hardest to wrap his mind around what had just dawned on him. He had tried his hardest to find a loop hole around what he had begun to think about more and more deeply. It didn't make sense, but still he couldn't help but wonder.

He didn't know Dr. Swann well, and had only met him a few times. He was a friendly older man who had been nothing but professional to Regan and him. He was always helpful and he never heard Regan complain about him.

He tried to wonder that maybe a neighbor had overheard where Regan had been found and word had spread quickly. He paced and paced until finally his heart began to throb. He honestly didn't know what to do.

He was tempted to call Bettina but looked at the clock and decided it could wait until morning. He knew she would keep a leveled head about this and after that maybe they could go to the police. Looking around his bedroom, his heart sank in its chest. It was East side of the house and their full sized bed was unmade due to Arthur's restless dreams. He knew he would have to change and wash the sheets and pillows soon but he didn't dare to now. Everything still reminded him so much of Regan. Her lovely perfume was still in the pillows and he found it comforting whenever he drifted off to sleep.

Bettina and two of her friends from a few blocks over offered to come in at the end of the week and help clean the house. Bettina said this was common after a death, that they would clean the house top of bottom and that he could help them box stuff up to put in the attic or goodwill. Bettina said it sounded like an awful thing, but it honestly was one of the only things that kept a person's mind off things at a time like this.

Arthur had walked around their house and knew there wasn't much to really clean. Regan and himself had been proud of their house and always kept it nice. He knew the ladies would come in and mop and wax the floors, dust, and clean out anything that needed to be clean. He would pay them of course, even though Bettina told him she would hear of no such thing. He honestly didn't want them to do it, but knew if it was up to him it would never get done.

Walking over to her closet, he opened it and sighed.

He stared at all her hanging clothes and took a handful and smelled them. Sighing, he felt himself crying again before letting go and looking up at her show boxes and hanging junk jewelry on the back of the closet. He honestly didn't know if he could let go of any of this. Shutting the door, he kept thinking of Dr. Swann and felt sick to this stomach.

Walking into their side bathroom, he ran the sink and splashed cold water on his face. He needed to snap out of this and think. Looking up at his reflection he felt worse. He didn't even look like himself anymore. Turning, he looked at the shower and sighed.

Her shampoos were still in there, her soaps, and her candles which were unlit and sitting around the edge of the tub. He couldn't count how many times in the morning they would shower together and usually make him late to class. He remembered all the times he would stand underneath the showerhead, allowing the warm beads of water to pour down on him as she approached him smiling, her hair slicked back. He remembered how she would softly kiss him down his chest and to his stomach before he would have to grab onto the walls and moan loudly before he would laugh. Looking at shower made his heart break a little before he quickly left the bathroom and snapped the light off.

Heading downstairs, his mind buzzed. He ran down the hallway and down the stairs and could almost see his beautiful wife screaming as somebody chased her.

Turning before he headed down the stairs he looked at the bare hallway floor and knew someone had raped and murdered her. This vision of the black figure was slowly coming into focus in his mind. He could see Dr. Swann running after her, wearing gloves and holding a knife. He could see Regan screaming and trying to get away. He could see him hitting her and then ripping open her tights before yanking down his fly…

Arthur turned away and headed down the stairs. Going into the kitchen he stood there for a second before looking around.

He remembered all the times after the surgery that Regan would look at him with those big beautiful eyes and smile. He remembered how scared he was when she was in pain, and how he couldn't stop thanking Dr. Swann for helping her.

He then looked over at the trash and saw something. Walking over, he saw Bettina had tried to stuff the ultrasound photos under some garbage in the trashcan. Looking at it he sighed before reaching in and pulling them out. Besides some coffee grounds sprinkled on them they were perfectly fine. Sighing he dusted them off and held them up.

He remembered when he first met Regan, back in the park. He had gotten a nosebleed and she was there to help. He remembered how beautiful she had looked and how they had locked eyes and he knew at that exact moment…

"I'm going to spend the rest of my life with this woman…"

Heading towards the sink, he grabbed one of Regan's lighters she used for her candles and stood over the sink. Looking at the photos of the baby one last time he felt goose bumps break out on his arms. Regan and him had made this, and someone had taken it away. Looking at the photo of his little girl, he traced it's head one last time and sniffled in.

"I'm sorry…"

Lighting the lighter, he slowly began to burn the edges of the plastic photograph. They crinkled and began to curl up as he watched the flames lick them up within seconds. Just like the person who had done this, the fire was taking away any evidence that he had come this close to having the perfect life.

Now it was gone.

He watched as the photographs burned up and silently cried when it hit him.

He remembered his dream with Regan, and how she had pointed to the vent. Letting the burnt ash remains of the two photos fall into the sink he stiffened and remembered completely. She was trying to tell him something. Looking down at the now burnt ashes of the ultrasound photo, Arthur's face crumbled up in pain. He wanted so badly to be wrong, but his heart wouldn't let him believe it.

Yanking open a draw, he took out a screwdriver, he headed for the stairs.

_**2010**_

It had started to rain.

The two of them sat together in the back of the taxi waiting for someone to speak. The driver head of them was too busy messing with his radio for a weather report. Ariadne stared at Arthur not knowing exactly what to say. He had just admitted to her that he had been married, and that his wife had been murdered. She now waited for him to finish what he was saying before thunder sounded loudly above them. Ariadne nervously jumped in her seat and Arthur smiled at her slightly amused.

"Not a fan of storms?"

Ariadne, completely forgetting what they had just been talking about nervously eyed the ceiling of the cab.

"Just had my fill of them lately I guess."

"Yeah you're telling me."

Ariadne glanced at him before sticking her chess piece back into her pocket.

"Where are you headed?"

Arthur shrugged.

"I have a place outside a vineyard, I go there whenever I need to be alone…mostly after some insane job."

Ariadne smirked.

"Like this one?"

Arthur smiled back at her and shook her head.

"Trust me, nothing has ever been like this one."

Ariadne smiled back before looking at how bad it was getting outside. The taxi at the moment was stuck in wonderful Los Angeles traffic on the freeway.

"What about you?"

"Going to visit my sister I guess. She's just gotten married. I was going to surprise her but I honestly don't think I'll be much company. Knowing I'll never be able to tell anyone what we did…remembering what we all created. I don't know, it's hard to explain…I feel this energy, like…"

"You're mind is till spinning."

"Exactly!"

Ariadne smiled, brushing back some hair behind her ear. Arthur smiled back at her before turning slightly.

"Tell you what, I have three guest rooms, and a whole pantry full of stuff that's been waiting to be cooked. Spend the night at my place and I'll drive you to my sister's in the morning."

Ariadne smiled.

"Really?"

"Yeah sure, I think it might do us some good to spend a little time with each other, at least then we can get all this talking about craziness out of our systems and move on."

"That would be nice…"

"Yeah, I mean it's nothing fancy but you're more than welcome. Besides I need to get home soon, a friend of mine has been watching my dogs for the past couple of months and the sooner I see them the better."

"You have dogs?"

"Yeah two German Shepherds, their great."

Ariadne smiled, she wanted to see where Arthur lived. Just minutes ago they had spoke about his wife, a woman she tried to imagine in her mind. A young lovely woman who must have suited Arthur perfectly. A woman who he must have been crazy about, since she saw nothing but pain when they talked about her.

"No…but I did."

The words echoed in Ariadne's mind. What did Arthur mean by this? She wanted to know more, but thought that maybe the reason why Arthur's past never affected him was because he was smart about keeping it at bay. In all senses she was still a stranger, and didn't want to skate on thin ice.

She listened as he told the driver directions to his house and sat back down. Looking over at him she felt an odd giddy feeling she couldn't ignore. The driver saw a free spot and drove the car into the next lane, heading towards an exit.

Sitting beside Arthur, Ariadne wondered what had happened to Arthur, and what was behind those dark pain filled eyes.

_**2007**_

Arthur got down on his knees at the same exact spot where Regan had been raped and murdered. Kneeling there for a second he felt a wave of dizziness wash over him before he leaned forward with his screw driver and began to undo the tiny golden screws of the vent.

He did this in the darkness, moonlight thinly spilling out across his face. His eyes intent on what he was doing, the screws came undone within seconds. Carefully taking the vent down he took a second.

"Remember when we first met Regan?"

He said out loud.

There wasn't a response, just silence. Taking a deep breath he fought back the tears.

"I was playing football with a few of my college buddies, you were sitting underneath a tree…I saw you and you saw me…"

His hand reached into the vent and began feeling around, within seconds his fingers felt it.

"I was trying to impress you even though I'm terrible at sports. I kept running around smiling at you and you were smiling back…then Rick threw the ball when I wasn't looking and it hit me in the face…"

He laughed through the tears and almost didn't want to look down at all. Instead he just wanted to slam the vent cover back on, screw in the tiny screws, and go back to sleep. Taking a second he continued.

"My nose wouldn't stop bleeding, and you ran over…you smiled down at me and told me your name…"

He looked down and saw what must have happened was at some point the person who attacked Regan had taken off his gloves. The police said there had been no prints, but Arthur knew whoever had done this was clever. He knew that Regan had slapped his hand away and a ring the person as wearing flew off.

As if fate designed it, the ring fell into the vent.

Arthur picked up the ring and saw it was Dr. Swann's medical school ring. The same ring Arthur had seen every time he shook his hand.

He knew the real reason why he had come by tonight. He wanted to see if Arthur wasn't home so he could sneak in and look for it.

Holding the ring up, Arthur blinked a few times before he lowered his head and cried.

_**One week earlier…**_

Regan sat upstairs in the office in the overstuffed comfy lounge chair that faced the window. On her lap top she had just finished a beautiful film that had just come out the year before called 'The Fall'. A few people from her publishing company recommended it, and she had just finished it. On her lap was a notepad and she was taking notes for the latest idea she had for a book. Sitting back, she tapped her pen against her teeth before smiling and setting her work aside.

She had enjoyed the move and thought it was beautiful. In fact she planned on showing Arthur that evening. Reaching over and shutting her laptop down, she glanced at her notes.

Her newest idea involved a sick little boy in a hospital who meets a friendly nurse who tells him a story of magic elephants that aren't afraid of dying. She knew it was a rough idea in the works, but she had a pretty good feeling about it.

Standing up, she put her notepad on her desk before smiling and opening the bottom draw. She was planning on showing Arthur these after dinner.

Taking the large envelope, she held it in her hands and smiled before putting it back away and shutting the draw. She hoped Arthur's reaction was what she had been day dreaming about for the last week or so. A nervous flutter entered her stomach and she pushed it away. She knew Arthur wouldn't be angry or disappointed. In fact, she knew what a good man Arthur was and that he would welcome this surprising new news with nothing but a smile.

She hoped.

Looking down at her stomach, she ran over hands over it and smiled.

Just then the doorbell rang.

Taking a second, Regan walked out of the office and down the hallway, softly humming to herself she knew it was probably Bettina wanting to sit down and have some coffee. Lately Bettina's latest thing was coming over to gossip about the McNeil's down the street, and how she thought the wife was having an affair. She usually just laughed this off, sat back and drank her coffee. Thinking of the weekend ahead of her, she smiled.

Going down the stairs, she was dressed in her plum colored dress and black tights. Her feet touching the stairs, she held onto the railing and came to the landing before opening the door. The person there surprised her.

"Dr. Swann?"

He was standing there in jeans and a black T-shirt, he had his hands behind his back and an odd smile planted on his face. Regan hadn't ever seen Dr. Swann in anything other than suits or scrubs. He somehow looked out of place like this…

His grin grew wider.

"Hello Regan."

Regan nervously laughed standing there, she liked Dr. Swann, she had been going to see him for a while and he had been more than helpful during her problem a few months ago, and had been very comforting and happy for her once she found out about the pregnancy.

A while back it started with being late, something Regan never really put any further mind to. He periods weren't always timely, mostly after the surgery. She ignored this until she began feeling off in the mornings. This usually happened after Arthur had left for class. She would get up and right away feel awful. Even the slightly smells like coffee turned her stomach and she had thrown up a total of four times before knowing something wasn't right. She was exhausted on top of that, and pretty moody. Arthur had been so busy writing his papers he barley noticed. When he did comment on how tired she had been lately she said she just felt a little worn down because of the weather change.

Finally one afternoon when Arthur was at class she decided to break down and buy a home pregnancy test. She remembered going to the drug store the next town over and buying a few magazines, gum, some hard candy for Arthur, and two pregnancy tests.

Going home she remembered nervously drumming her fingers against the sink and waiting, reading the directions on the back of the box over and over again. Finally it was time, taking a deep breath she walked over, picked up the plastic strip and looked.

Blue.

She blinked and couldn't believe it.

She checked the back of the box over and over again before laughing.

This was totally unexpected. In fact she had thought if Arthur and her had any kids, it would be in another ten years. Growing up, mostly in high school she used to say how she never wanted kids. That she was too selfish and couldn't do it. Once college hit, and she had a few years behind her and the success of her books, she began seeing how nice children were and how the little world they lived in was safe and perfect. She would go to book signings and visit hospitals and read to them and saw how much she loved their company. It finally wasn't until she met Arthur and she found herself privately saying…

"I want to have kids with this man."

She wanted to wait, and mostly after the surgery she was nervous that their chance of someday ever having one was ruined. Now seeing the positive pregnancy test in her hands, she knew it had to be fate. That night she hid the tests and greeted Arthur at the door. Wrapping her arms around him, she squeezed him and kiss him, nearly knocking him down.

"Whoa, what was that for?"

He asked laughing. Regan kissed his cheek and smiled, looking into his handsome eyes.

"Nothing, guess I just missed you."

That night, she laid awake watching him.

She had gone to see Dr. Swann right away, and before she knew it she was looking on a tiny screen at the baby Arthur and her were having. She remembered Dr. Swann smiling, pointing it out to her and saying everything looked perfectly fine. The baby was healthy, and everything was okay. Regan told him she was going to suspires Arthur, and Dr. Swann had been nothing but a perfect friend to her and got her excited to tell Arthur.

"You're husband is going to be really excited."

She remembered him saying.

Just a few days ago she went to his office and asked him to print out the ultrasound photos. She was planning on telling Arthur this weekend. Dr. Swann smiled handing her the envelope. That afternoon she went to the card store and picked one out. She was excited, but nervous at the same time. Driving home that afternoon, she couldn't help but smile.

She was going to be a mother.

Now here she stood a few days later standing in the doorway looking at her doctor, and wondering what he was doing here.

"What are you doing here?"

Dr. Swann shrugged.

"I was driving in the neighborhood and saw your house, just wanted to make sure everything was okay."

This was when Regan began to feel a little uneasy. Nervously smiling she stood there, wondering in the back of her mind when Arthur was going to be home.

"Well…that's nice…"

She looked over his shoulder and wondered if Mr. Anderson was on his porch, he wasn't. Outside she heard birds chirping and heard her wind chimes slowly jingle.

"Did you tell Arthur yet?"

"Hum?"

Dr. Swann smiled.

"About…the baby…"

Regan then remembered how lately, in fact ever since she came in for her blood test and the first ultrasound, the past couple of visits had been weird. She couldn't really explain it, but she had been wondering why suddenly she didn't feel comfortable. She now wished she had told someone about the pregnancy, even Bettina so she could explain why she hadn't been feeling exactly right about Dr. Swann. For so long he had been nothing but helpful for her…now something seemed off. She couldn't explain it, nor really put it into words, but the looks he had been giving her, the rude little comments about Arthur and just in general how he had been acting since she found out she was pregnant.

She remembered how when she first made her first appointment at the doctor's after taking the pregnancy test how Dr. Swann was giving her a pelvic ultrasound, and how the second the tiny little screen lit up and he saw the baby, Regan saw his face drop.

"Yep, you were right…you're pregnant."

His voice was flat before she sat up slightly in her hospital gown, looking at the screen and feeling overwhelmed and overjoyed at the same time.

"Really?"

She remembered him slowly nodding, almost a disappointed look in his eyes when he shoved the paddle further up into her, almost forceful making her stiffen up before he shot her a look. Regan remembered feeling beyond uncomfortable and shifting slightly before he pointed to the screen.

"Fetus is about nine to ten weeks, looks perfectly healthy and is growing just fine…there's the head, and the spine…and here's the heartbeat."

Flipping a switch a thumping filled the room and Regan suddenly forgot the moment of weirdness that happened. Instead she sat up, smiling.

"Do you know if it's a boy or a girl?"

Dr. Swann looked annoyed but nodded.

"It's still early, and it's moving a lot…but I think you're having a little girl."

Regan wanted to gasp, staring at the screen she couldn't help but smile. Arthur and her were having a little girl…

After that Regan remembered the next few visits had gotten weirder, it was almost as if he hated the fact that she was pregnant. When he sat down with her, going over her medical records and giving her paperwork and advice on how to take care of herself along with vitamins, she sensed he rushed through everything and kept asking her when she was going to tell Arthur, when she told him she wanted to surprise him he made a comment that caught her off guard.

"Well you're going to be showing soon Regan, Jesus…"

She left the office finding this odd but ignored this. There were two other visits since then. The next ultrasound he kept touching her stomach remarking how he honestly couldn't believe she had gotten pregnant after her problem and how she was taking a big risk and her own health might be at risk.

"There's always time for abortion Regan."

He said, this pissed her off. Hardly able to believe he was saying such things she looked up at him as he moved the paddle across her stomach.

"Dr. Swann, I want this baby…and I'm sure Arthur will to. Like you said it's a miracle it even happened."

"Yeah, no thanks to Arthur…"

He mumbled.

The last visit he seemed annoyed when she told him she was about to tell Arthur and wanted the photos. She remembered the look he gave her the entire time and that's when she decided that after she broke the news to Arthur she would switch doctors. She liked Dr. Swann, and he had helped her…but now she just didn't feel right with him. She knew if she told Arthur any of this he would lose his mind, he had always been very over protective about her.

Now she stood there, in the middle of the day waiting for her husband to come home so she could hand him the card and envelope that was going to change their futures. She was in her early twenties, happy, and very much in love. At that exact moment nothing was wrong.

"Is Arthur home?"

Regan stared at him and faked a smile.

"No, he's due back home any second, just getting back from class…"

"Oh good…so you're all alone?"

Regan looked over his shoulder again and saw nobody around on the street, at that exact moment she hoped someone, anyone would walk by. Regretting opening the door, she slowly nodded.

"Um, Dr. Swann…"

"Philip, don't tell me I need to remind you again."

Regan smiled.

"Of course…I'm sorry, I have someone on hold on the phone so I better go, I'll give you a call later this week…"

"That little prick had to do this to you didn't he?"

Regan stopped dead in her tracks, just about to close the door.

"What?"

Dr. Swann shook his head.

"That little prick had to finally use those balls of his and knock you up and take you away…I knew you were different Regan, but I never thought you would do this…"

Regan now wanted Arthur's car to pull up, she waited for it then knew what she had to do. She would slam the door, run and grab the phone, and call the police.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me you little slut…now I'm going to have to take care of what your husband started."

That's when the knife came from behind his back, nearly six inches long and glittering in the sun. It was a hunter's knife, and he held it in his gloved hand.

He kept smiling, Regan stared at the knife, her eyes catching the blade before she knew she had to run. He was crazy and he was going to do something horrible. Looking at him, she tried her hardest to be calm before she saw her chance. Spinning around she attempted to slam the door but his hand went out and stopped it. Screaming, Regan turned and he grabbed a handful of her hair and yanked hard. Her tight legged feet nearly slipped on the floor as she ran as fast as she could towards the living room.

Running towards the living room she heard him stomping behind her, trying to reach the living room she thought she could dart through the living room and go out the back door and make a run for it. Thinking of her baby inside of her, she began to panic. She knew something was wrong with Philip, now he was trying to kill her in broad day light before her husband came home.

Running, she nearly made it before she grabbed her again, trying to throw her. Throwing back her arms, she fought away from him as he grabbed the table behind the sofa and flung it to the floor. With a loud crash, she heard glass break before he got in her way. Running to the side, she missed him by an inch and saw her chance, hurrying back up away from him she knew she should go out the front door, but with him right behind her she made it towards the stairs.

Grabbing her ankle, she screamed and kicked him off, she heard him crashing up behind her, as he grabbed her legs again. Screaming, she kicked back before making it to the hallway. Her cell was in the office, she knew if she got in there and locked the door he would just leave. Her heart pounding in her chest, she struggled to stand up before she heard his go up the steps.

"YOU LITTLE BITCH!"

He grabbed her again, wrapping his arms around her waist and squeezing hard. Her legs kicking midair, she screamed before he threw her down hard onto the wooden floor. Hitting her face hard, she took a second before quickly scrambling to get away. Her tights causing her to slip, she tried her hardest to stand up before he grabbed her by the hair again and kicked her in the ribs. Crying out, she lashed out, struggling and fighting back to get away. A few seconds later he kicked her again, hard enough to make her black out. Throwing her down, he straddled her and put the knife up against her throat.

Regan's eyes widened.

"Please…don't do this…please don't hurt my baby…"

She begged.

That's when Dr. Swann laughed, grabbing the knife he raised it and shoved it straight into her stomach, making her mouth open in a breathless gasp. Pain exploded inside of her as she knife the blade dig inside her flesh before he pulled it back out. Regan saw the blade was bloody before looking down at herself. Her dress was quickly getting stained with what looked like black blood.

"My baby…"

She thought, trying her hardest to lace her hands together to cover it, blood oozed in-between her fingers as she cried out. The pain was horrible and throbbed. She knew this bastard had killed her baby, the same baby Arthur had given her and that she had been protecting inside of her. Now it was probably going to drown in her own blood before she could even tell Arthur about the baby she had given her. For a brief second a vision came to her of a few years from now. She could see Arthur downstairs in the living room, holding the tiny little hands of their little daughter and teaching her how to walk. She could see their little girl looked exactly like him and would giggle every time he spoke to her.

"You little slut, open your legs I'm going to fuck you…"

Regan began trying to slap him away, her hands going up and trying to get his weight off him. Lifting her hands, she slapped at him, trying to claw when he stabbed her again, further up in the chest. Screaming, she tried to get away before he reached down and began to rip the crotch of her tights.

"Relax damnit!"

Looking up at the ceiling, a single tear rolled down her face, wondering where Arthur was.

Twelve minutes later, after lots of fighting and struggling, Regan was dead. Dr. Swann had raped her, and had worn a condom. He didn't last long and right before he roughly finished, he took the blade of the knife and silently slit her throat. Gurgling on her own blood, Regan stared up at him with confused eyes before everything began going numb. Her insides were sore, she was bleeding, and he had begun to stab her again. She wanted so badly to push him off her and just roll over.

"Stop it; I'm all ready dead…"

She wanted to tell him. She just wanted to be left alone. She was bleeding, and her vision began to blur.

Her husband would find her in less than a half an hour dead.

Before everything darkened around her, she saw herself in a park during the fall. She was going down a path and the trees around her were beautiful colors of red, orange, and gold. She walked, hearing the leafs crunch underneath her shoes before she stopped.

Where was Arthur?

She wanted to turn back but she couldn't…

There wasn't enough time.

_**2007**_

Arthur sat in the kitchen until dawn.

He sat there in silence holding the ring.

It was Dr. Swann's medical school ring.

He sat there, rolling the ring in-between his fingers and thinking. Why would he want to hurt his Regan? Ever since he had her as a patient he had been nothing more than helpful and professional. He wanted it so badly to be a mistake but he knew Regan had wanted him to find this ring.

That bastard had broken in, raped and murdered his wife…his pregnant wife.

He sat there before thinking of the choice he had. He could either go to the police…or take care of this himself. Sitting there he looked at his left hand and stared at his own wedding band. Finally before dawn touched the sky, he had made his choice. Silently, he got up from the kitchen table and began to make a plan.


	7. Chapter 7

_**2010**_

In the past ten hours, Ariadne had gone through many different worlds, but at that exact moment she was about to enter one that had struck up her curiously, and had made her a little more than scared to enter.

The rain was beginning to stop, and the taxi drove up a long dirt road, surrounded by fields of beautiful trees. Sitting beside Arthur, Ariadne watched him as he dug into the back pocket of his slacks and took out a set of keys and a wallet.

"A have a woman come in a few times a week to water the plants and make sure the entire place isn't covered in cobwebs, let's see if she was worth the money."

Ariadne softly smiled before the taxi brought them up to a beautiful ranch style house entirely made out of Mexican style brick and stone. Cactus grew outside the windows along with wild exotic flowers. Ariadne heard the tires crunch down on the gravel driveway before it came to a stop. Right away Ariadne reached into her bag to split the difference of the ride when Arthur simply waved his hand and handed the driver a very large bill.

"Keep the change, thanks again."

The driver grinned.

"Need help with your bags buddy?"

"No, we're okay. Thanks again."

Arthur then handed Ariadne his jacket along with his set of keys.

"Run on up and unlock the door, I'll get the bags."

"You sure."

"Yeah, here so you don't get wet."

Ariadne smiled, Arthur might have been a little standoffish and moody, but he still was the perfect gentlemen. Making sure her bag was over her shoulder, she took his jacket and keys and opened the door the same exact moment he opened his. Quickly she draped the jacket over her head, even though she honestly didn't care if she got wet or not and ran and fast as she could up the steps. It was a warm rain, and she saw there was a stone fountain which was overgrown with vines which was collecting water. Under shelter, she turned and watched as Arthur went to the trunk and grabbed their bags. A very serious look on his face as he hurried along as the rain beated down on him. Ariadne watched him and felt that flutter fill herself again, turning she found the brass key that opened the door and let herself inside.

Inside the ceilings were ten times higher than she thought. Looking up, she admired the skylights and the echo noise the rain made outside. Standing in the hallway, she saw a large beautiful framed mirror on the clay colored wall, along with a brass table which held a crystal bowl which was filled with keys. Not wanting to track in any water, she stood there for a second and smelled the faint scent of vanilla. Just then Arthur came behind her, carrying both of their bags. Ariadne saw the taxi drive back down the road and slowly out of sight. Standing that close to Arthur, she saw that he was dripping wet. His slicked back hair had collected beads of water, and his dress shirt and tie were nearly soaked through.

"You're soaked…"

"I'll live, besides it's a little refreshing to feel something real huh?"

He gave her a cocky grin that caused her to smile and feel like a sixteen year old all over again. Handing him his jacket she looked around.

"This place is amazing…"

Arthur took his jacket and threw it over his shoulder before picking up the bags again.

"Come on I'll show you around."

"My shoes are wet."

"That's okay, come on…"

Arthur led the way, carrying the bags as Ariadne followed. Right away the hallway opened up to a beautiful living room with a huge stone fireplace in the middle. The entire North side of the house was entirely made out of glass, which showed off the vineyards behind the property. It was all hardwood floor, and the long sofas and chairs were a caramel color. The coffee tables were carved wood from what Ariadne guessed was from overseas, and the artwork that were scattered were very 18th century English and African. The entire inside looked as if it had been set up in some magazine, everything seemed to be in perfect order which Ariadne guessed was Arthur's way of living.

Arthur set down the bags before walking over to the archway that lead to the kitchen. Smiling, he took a small piece of paper that was laying on a class table surrounded by glass vases and antique clocks. Ariadne watched Arthur quickly scan it before a smile spread across his face.

"All right!"

"What?"

"My neighbor had to run into the city and left the dogs in the garage, hold on a second I'll go get them."

Ariadne nervously smiled.

"Are they friendly?"

Arthur smirked.

"Are you kidding? There're going to love you."

Ariadne smiled at this comment and watched his disappear into the kitchen. Standing there and feeling a little out of place, she walked over to a table near the hallway where she expected it to lead to the bedrooms.

Framed, were beautiful drawings of what appeared to be children's stories. She didn't exactly what which ones they were from, but she thought the artwork was breathtaking. Standing there, she closely looked at them before pausing and looking at the center photo which as framed.

It was of a beautiful woman who was standing outside a pool in a two piece bathing suit. She had her hands on her hips and a pair of oversized sunglasses on. She was laughing, and right away Ariadne knew who this was.

Standing back, she looked at the photograph and suddenly felt guilty. After everything they had been through, she was staying in Arthur's house feeling the way she did while he it was obvious he still was heartbroken over what happened to his wife. In fact, this house seemed to be a frozen tomb which showed evidence that Arthur had at one point had a very happy life. Sighing, she remembered what he said.

Right away she knew Arthur had done something…something terrible.

Just then she heard the scamper of paws running up the stairs, turning she smiled as two beautiful well groomed large German shepherds came running in at full speed. Right away a huge smile appeared on her face as the dogs ran towards her.

"Kim! Novak! Slow down!"

The dogs ran towards Ariadne, nearly knocking her down. Laughing, she knelt down and began to pet the huge horse sized dogs and giggled as they licked her. Right away Arthur ran over, kneeling down, his hair and clothes still dripping wet.

"Sorry, they get super excited whenever they see new people."

Ariadne laughed, petting the dogs.

"Their wonderful! Hello babies!"

She said in a high voice, petting them more. Arthur watched smiling and petted his dogs with her. Ariadne smiled before raising an eyebrow.

"Kim and Novak huh?"

Arthur smiled.

"I'm a big Vertigo fan what can I say?"

Ariadne smiled, kissing the dogs' heads.

"Oh, it's nice not to be dreaming anymore…"

Ariadne softly said as she ruffled the dog's hair. Arthur smiled.

"Yeah I know what you mean Regan…"

Ariadne stopped and looked at him, half smiling.

"What?"

Right away Arthur's face dropped catching himself. All color drained from his face before he stared at the ground and shook his head.

"I'm…I'm sorry…"

Quickly getting up, he went into the kitchen, leaving Ariadne puzzled.

_**2007**_

Three weeks had passed since Regan had been killed, and Arthur was patiently waiting.

He knew in order to do what he planned, he needed to play the part perfectly, this gave his mind something to do, and looking back on those horrible weeks following his young wife's murder, he knew if he hadn't of done this he would of gone completely insane.

He wasn't getting much sleep, but that was a good thing.

Every time he dreamed, he dreamed of her.

It started back with the memory of when they first met. He was in the city at the park with a few buddies of his from college. It was a beautiful crisp autumn day, and he was having a great time. Dressed in jeans and a black hoddie, his hair slightly longer back then, he remembered running with his friends Jeff, and Mark and feeling completely alive. His legs pumping, he ran across the leaf littered grass, taking deep cold breaths of the air and laughing as they attempted to tackle him.

He was laughing as he caught of football and ran as fast as he could. He was young, and away on a scholarship, his foster parents couldn't touch him anymore and he was completely happy. He had his whole life ahead of him and at that exact moment, he couldn't have been happier.

That's when he saw her.

She was sitting underneath a tree Indian style in jeans and a black vest with a fur trim hood. She had dangling green earrings on, and a book open on her lap. Her beautiful blue eyes caught his and right away he smiled.

"She's pretty…"

He thought before smiling, he hadn't ever seen her before. That's when she smiled back and he saw she was looking at him. Blushing a little bit, he grinned causing her to laugh before Jeff yelled for him and threw him the ball. Catching it, he glanced over and saw she was watching. Smiling even more, he decided to attempt to impress her and began running as fast as he could, spinning and throwing the ball.

She watched him the entire time.

Finally just when he thought he looked good, Mark threw the ball at full speed right at him as Jeff tackled him. Knocking the wind out of him, Arthur fell backwards as the ball smashed into his face. Hitting the ground hard, he nearly blacked out.

"Jesus!"

Jeff got up and Mark ran over, both looked down at him with concerned faces.

"Sorry man, thought you saw it coming."

Arthur blinked, looking up at the evening sky before taking a second. His face killed, and so didn't his chest and stomach. Trying to sit up, he felt dizzy. That's when Jeff pointed.

"You're lip and nose is bleeding man, aw jeez I'm sorry."

"You okay?"

The voice made Arthur looked up, Jeff and Mark turned as well as the girl stood there, hands shoved in the front pockets of her vest, her breath coming out in little clouds.

Mark and Jeff eyed each other and smiled before Arthur wanted to kill himself for looking so stupid. Touching his lip, he saw on his fingertip blood.

"Yeah I'm fine..."

"Listen, I can take a look at that, I've had my share of bloody noses before…"

Arthur now felt embarrassed.

"No, I'm fine…"

Jeff and Mark looked at each other before smiling.

"Don't listen to him, he's a little shaken up from the fall of course he'll go with you."

Arthur slowly got up, his chest aching before he felt more blood dribble down his face from his nose. Leaning in close to Jeff he whispered…

"What are you doing?"

"Don't be stupid man, she's hot."

"I don't even know her."

"Quit being a wimp and just do it!"

The girl smiled watching them before they pulled apart and tried to look cool. Jeff patted Arthur on the shoulder.

"We need to get going, we have night class…we'll see you later Arthur."

Before Arthur could say anything, both Jeff and Mark grabbed the football and began running off, watching them Arthur shook his head. The girl walked closer and right away Arthur smelled her perfume, it was nice.

"Some friends you have their huh?"

Arthur smiled shaking his head before putting his hand under his nose.

"Yeah I guess you could say that, sorry."

"No problem, when I was in high school I worked at a camp so I'm trained in first aid…just glad to help a cute guy."

Arthur looked at her and smiled.

"Well in that case…"

Both laughed before the girl offered her hand.

"Regan…and you are Arthur?"

Arthur used his free hand and shook hers, it was much smaller than his, but her skin was soft and smooth.

"Yeah, nice to meet you."

"Come on, there's a coffee place in the lobby of the hotel I'm staying at across from the park."

"The legacy hotel?"

"Yeah, just for the week, it's got a nice view…came here to relax for a little bit, it's such a nice day."

"Yeah I love the fall."

"Me too, Halloween is one of my favorite holidays."

Smiling, Arthur walked beside her.

"What are you reading?"

"Oh, just an old mystery novel, their guilty pleasures…"

Arthur smiled as they made their way down a path, the sun as just beginning to set and the sky looked as if it were on fire. Smiling, he walked beside her hearing their shoes crunch underneath the leafs.

"You a student?"

"Yeah, senior year…"

"What's your major?"

"Dream psychology."

"Really?"

"Yeah, I'm heading off to the University next semester for grad school."

"That's a real interesting major."

Arthur smiled and shrugged.

"Yeah, I don't think it's going to get me any dreams any time soon but it's really interesting."

"So you study dreams?"

"Yeah you could say that."

"That's really cool, I've never heard of anything like that before."

"What about you, I haven't ever seen you around here…"

"Oh I'm from Larchwood, I'm here for a book signing."

"Book signing?"

Regan blushed and looked down for a second as they walked.

"Yeah, I work for a publishing company, I wrote a book a few years back and I'm working on my new one, their children's books and my company sent me here for the weekend. I just graduated last spring and I'm just doing this for the extra cash."

"Wow that's really awesome."

Regan looked at him and they caught each other's eyes again. Smiling, they continued to walk.

_**Later… **_

It was a little after eight when Arthur offered to walk Regan up to her room. For the past several hours they had sat together on the coffee shop talking. Earlier Regan had brought him into the lobby which looked as if it belonged in New York city rather than New England. The ceilings were high and had beautiful chandeliers hanging entirely made out of crystal. The floors were a caramel and white colored marble, and most of the walls were entirely made from mirrors. Taking him into the small coffee shop, the smells of muffins, cider, and coffee filled his nose.

"Go ahead sit down, I'll get some ice."

Arthur did so and saw only a few people sitting around. Most of them were hunched over their laptops or silently sipping their coffees. Watching Regan, he saw her go up to the counter and admired the view. She was a little shorter than him, beautiful dark hair, and a wonderful body. He thought she looked cute in her vest and jeans, and noticed she had black boots on as well.

Right away he felt embarrassed. Of all ways to meet a girl it had to be him getting hit in the face. Here he was, sitting down with his head tilted back as blood dried on his face. Feeling like a complete idiot, he sighed deeply to himself. The last real relationship he had was senior year of high school. Since then it had been a handful of one night stands and horrible blind dates.

Regan walked over a few minutes later with some cloth napkins and a small cup of ice. Smirking, Arthur put his head back but carefully made sure his hand was under his nose so he wouldn't bleed all over the place.

"One hell of a way to meet someone huh?"

Regan smiled at his remark and began to put the chunks of ice one by one into the napkin.

"Okay, this might sting for a second but keep it on your lip."

Gently, she pressed the coldness of the cloth against him and Arthur winced. Laughing, Regan made a face.

"Don't be such a baby."

Arthur smiled despite the pain.

"That's easy for you to say."

Looking at his face closely, they locked eyes again and Arthur knew if he got an erection at that exact moment he would honestly kill himself. Smelling her perfume, he gazed into her eyes before she lifted the paced ice cloth and softly blew on his lip.

Arthur sat there in silence allowing her to do so before she reached over and brushed back a few of his bangs.

"I think you'll live."

Arthur smiled.

After Regan helped him clean up his face, his nose had stopped bleeding and she said his lip might be a little swollen for the next couple of days but nothing serious. Smiling, Arthur looked at her.

"So, used to work at a camp huh?"

Smiling, Regan talked a little about her old jobs she had during the summer as a teenager. This turned towards where Arthur was originally from, and then went on to his major again. By then the waiter brought over two coffees.

Arthur looked slightly surprised and began to reach for his wallet when Regan waved his hand.

"It's on me."

"No, I can't let you do that, you've done enough…"

"It's my pleasure really. You're the first person I've really met here…it's nice."

Smiling, the two enjoyed their coffee.

The conversation turned towards their favorite foods, to places they loved to go and eat, to traveling, then their favorite movies, and music and art which they couldn't seem to stop talking about. Three more cups of coffee and a shared slice of pie later, Arthur saw they had a lot in common, so much in fact it was scary.

They laughed at each other's stories and jokes, and really listened when they went on about their lives. Arthur thought it was amazing that Regan was a published author, even though she said one day she would love to write a thriller or mystery. Arthur skimmed over his whole family and past without going into detail, but went on and on about how much he was looking forward to the research he was going to do next year.

Finally the coffee shop was about to close and it dawned on them how much time had passed. Laughing, Regan said she had to go to a meeting in the morning.

"Are you leaving soon?"

"I need to get back to Larchwood, but I might come back before Halloween, I heard a ton of stuff goes down over here and I would love to bring a few friends."

Arthur told her that would be great, that the campus usually had great parties and it would be amazing if she came. Smiling, they stared at each other before Regan took out her cell phone.

"I don't usually do this, but seeing that you like pretty much every awesome thing in the world…"

Arthur saw what she was doing and opened his cell phone as well. Before they exchanged numbers, he smiled at her.

Both aggrieved they had to meet up again, in a world where they were used to meeting so many weirdo's, this was a nice change of pace. That's when Arthur offered to walk her up.

The elevator ride they stood together and when the elevator jumped a little before going up Regan laughed softly to herself. Smiling, Arthur looked at her.

"What?"

"That jump, always makes me feel like I'm gonna go flying up."

Upstairs Regan and Arthur walked down the long hallway leading to the elevators. Arthur walked around, impressed by the inside of the hotel and how elegant the building was. Everything even down to the carpets seemed perfect.

"This place is amazing."

Regan smiled digging in her pocket for her key card.

"Yeah, that's the nice thing about these signings, they always put me in nice hotels…"

Arthur looked around in wonder before Regan found her door. Putting the card in, she opened the door. Leaning against the wall she smiled.

"I would invite you in but that wouldn't be very lady like would it?"

Arthur grinned.

"Also I might turn into a pumpkin before midnight so yeah I guess it's for the best."

Laughing, Regan looked at him.

"This was nice…"

"Yeah it was."

"Listen, if you don't have class tomorrow afternoon…"

"I don't."

Regan laughed.

"Well then, maybe we can grab some lunch?"

Arthur smiled.

"I would love you."

"Okay, why don't you send me a text tomorrow and we'll meet up somewhere okay?"

"Sure, that sounds awesome. Thanks again by the way."

Regan smiled before kissing her finger and leaning over and pressing it against his sore lip.

"Sweet dreams Arthur."

Winking at him she went into her room and closed the door. Standing there, Arthur seemed completely stunned. Gently touching his lip he smiled before looking around. He honestly couldn't believe his luck. Laughing, he ran his hand through his hair before turning and walking down the hallway. After he was far enough from Regan's door, he broke out into a complete run before kicking his feet together and laughing.

That's when he nearly crashed into the maid with her cart. Laughing, he almost knocked it over.

"Sorry!"

He said laughing, before heading to the elevators.

_**2007, present day**_

Arthur knelt in front of Regan's grave.

The headstone had just been put up a few days before hand. Arthur remembered writing out the check and feeling sick to this stomach. This was coming out of the small little account Regan and himself had been saving up for their student loans and any vacations they wanted to take in the future. He had felt like a zombie picking out the headstone, but Sara and Bettina had been with him then, and he simply just pointed at one he thought looked pretty.

It was a dark marble with white lettering. It had Regan's full name and followed by two dates. Nothing special, since Arthur honestly couldn't put his heart into doing anything else.

The cemetery where she had been buried was lovely. It was a small safe little place that Regan had taken him that past autumn to do stone rubbings. Arthur remembered feeling silly but Regan had a plan to frame some of the good ones and hang them up in the upstairs hall.

The same hallway she was raped and murdered in.

Pushing away that thought, he stared at her gave and sighed.

He couldn't believe it had been just three weeks.

Underneath there, buried away was his beautiful wife. Horrible images came to him of her rotting inside that dark damp coffin. The same coffin that held their unborn daughter. Closing his eyes, he reached out and pressed his fingers against the cool marble. Flowers had been placed there, more than likely from Bettina.

He had wanted to talk to her about what had happened. In all honestly he didn't believe in the supernatural, he didn't believe that those few dreams he had of Regan was her way of showing him what had happened. He knew that it was his subconscious that had suspected Philip and his mind had just put together the pieces. The medical ring was now safely tucked away in his dresser under his shirts.

His chest began to shake before he felt tears working their way up again. Forcing them down, he wanted so badly to turn this horrible pain into something else. He wanted the rage to overtake him so he wouldn't ever have to feel again.

The last few nights he had been dreaming about Regan, and every time he woke he was crying.

He knew he needed to do something.

Slowly standing up, he glanced down at Regan's grave before shaking his head.

"What happened to you was wrong, it wasn't right. I promise I'll fix things Regan…I promise."

Turning, he silently went back to his car, unaware that someone was watching him.

_**2010 **_

"Arthur?"

Ariadne slowly walked into the kitchen to find Arthur leaning against the counter, his head was down as rain splattered against the windows above the sink. Biting her bottom lip, she took a moment before silently walking in, unsure what to say or do.

"Arthur?"

She repeated. Just then Novak walked over beside her, nuzzling her leg.

Arthur looked over, his eyes for once exhausted. She saw he was on the verge of crying. Laughing it off, he cleared his throat before looking down.

"Sorry about that."

"Are you okay?"

Arthur quickly nodded looking ahead out the window.

"Yeah, can't believe I did that."

"Regan…that was your wife's name right?"

Arthur looked at her and nodded.

"Yeah, it was."

"And those are your wedding bands around your neck?"

Arthur looked down at himself, for once forgetting to tuck the chain in his shirt. Looking down at both of them he nodded.

"Arthur…how come I didn't see Regan in any of your dreams? How come you weren't like Cobb?"

Arthur gripped the counter before deeply sighing.

"Because…unlike Cobb I was able to finally accept that Regan wasn't coming back, nor ever would. She's dead…and a long time ago I learned to deal with that, maybe not completely but I know that's the only way she'll be in peace."

"Your dreams…do they have anything to do with her?"

"Of course they do, the hotel we were in…that was the hotel she was staying at when we first met. I take little memories and piece them together."

"Does she ever appear to you?"

Arthur shrugged.

"Once and a while…only when I'm alone, their memories mostly, but it's still nice to just see her face, even if it's just for a second."

"Does…anyone on the team know?"

"About Regan?"

Ariadne nodded.

"Yeah, Cobb and his father in-law were the ones who helped me out after I got into a bit of trouble after her death. They had been researching my studies for a while and offered me the position of the point man. I wouldn't have taken it any other way…but what choice did I have. Besides, they stuff they introduced me to…well you know, you can't explain it."

"So it was an escape for you?"

"In the beginning, then I learned that it wasn't…that all of that wasn't real. Don't get me wrong it's amazing, and there's nothing really like it, but it wasn't Regan. It helped me, but I guess the only reason I've stayed on the team as long as I have is because I'm one of the few that can still control it."

"Arthur…what trouble were you in when Cobb found you? Did it have something to do with who killed your wife?"

Arthur turned, leaning against the counter before Novak left Ariadne's side and went over to him. Allowing the dog to lick his hand, Arthur softly smiled.

"What happened is in the past…I did something horrible and the worst part of it is the fact I don't regret it."

"Did you kill Regan's murderer?"

Ariadne's words hung in the air for a moment before Arthur shook his head.

"Ariadne…"

"Please, I don't mean to intrude but if it wasn't for you…we all would have been trapped down there. You're special Arthur…"

Arthur smirked.

"Yeah sure…"

Ariadne stepped closer, raising his eyes he looked at her. The only sound around them was the rain falling outside. Finally he sighed.

"Yes…I did. I did it because that sick bastard not only took away my wife, but he took away the baby I was going to have with Regan. He took my entire family…"

Before Arthur could say another word Ariadne raced over, wrapping her arms around him tightly and hugging him. Arthur stood there stiff, not knowing exactly what to do before he slowly put his arms around her and hugged back.

_**2007**_

It was now nearly two months since Regan had been killed.

Bettina and her friends had come to the house weeks ago and did the clean they had promised. Bettina's son, who had been away at school and come to visit that weekend and had taken Arthur out for a few beers,. That afternoon had been a little awkward since they didn't have much to talk about, but Arthur was relieved he was somewhere else and had time to silently think to himself.

When he returned home the house seemed a little different. It was spotless of course, but it didn't seem to have Regan in it anymore. All of her clothes had been boxed up, including her work, books, records, photos, and junk. Most of the stuff had been labeled and put away up in the attic. The rest went to Goodwill.

Arthur had looked through some of Regan's things and once again it hit him.

His wife was dead.

He didn't return to school, instead he told the school he would return the next semester. They of course more than understood, even though Arthur really didn't intend to go back at all.

He had plenty of money to keep him afloat, a week or two ago he received a check in the mail from Regan's publishing company. Every month or so she would receive checks in the mail from them. Looking at the money he felt sick and just put it away in the bank. He had no use for it, nor even wanted to see it. He mostly sat alone in his house, crying, sleeping, and thinking. Nothing was the same anymore, and all he could think of was her.

He stopped using upstairs; he couldn't bring himself to walk down the hallway anymore.

Now he sat in the basement on their old couch they had thrown down there and looked at what he had bought.

A shotgun.

He had bought it in the city, unmarked from a source he had found out about at a bar after he threw down a few hundred. He didn't exactly know if the gun was clean or not, nor even cared if he got caught. All that mattered now was that he would finish this. For weeks now he had been playing the part. He got up every morning, now sleeping on the couch, ate breakfast, took a shower, changed, and sat around the house. When Bettina visited he pretended he was working on his papers, even faking a few laughs to show her he was slowly moving on.

The truth was he was hurting worse than ever now.

He would sleep most of the day, planning, and waiting.

The medical ring was in his hand as he sat there looking at the gun. It was going to happen soon, and finally it would all end. Sitting there, he leaned back and shut his eyes…

_He was outside._

_He was in the park, the same park where he had met his wife. It was a beautiful autumn morning and there was a chill in the air. He was on the path, surrounded by beautiful colorful trees, all brilliant colors of red, orange, and gold._

_Leafs fell from the sky and the sounds of children playing came from the distance._

_He walked down the path and saw Regan, dressed exactly the same way she did the day they met. She was ahead of him, walking backwards with her hands shoved in her pockets laughing._

_He watched her, knowing he wouldn't be able to catch up to her._

_Watching her, he stopped…knowing the only way he could ever reach her…would be to finish it _


	8. Chapter 8

Ariadne pulled back and felt her heart pounding in her chest. Taking a second, she locked eyes with Arthur who was just a mere inch away from her face. She could smell a mixture of cologne and rain water. She studied his face close and found it completely flawless. His dark eyes, his full lips, his sharp and handsome classic features. She saw tiny rain drops roll down his slicked back hair. Staring at him, something inside of her knew at that exact moment that she was honestly in love.

She couldn't explain it. She had only known Arthur for a few months, yet just a few hours ago they had shared something past anything she knew she could ever know nor witness again. In fact, everyone who had gone into the dream were forever linked for doing the impossible.

Looking in his eyes she saw he was an old soul trapped in a young man's body. He was still suffering with the fact his wife and baby had been taken from him in the most horrible brutal way. His only escape was using that brilliant mind of his. He was so young, yet looked as if the grief was so overwhelming it was slowly killing him and staying in constant pain.

Ariadne couldn't take it anymore. Leaning forward, she kissed him. Pressing her lips against his for dear life. Closing her eyes she found herself starting to get lost. Her entire body felt like it was on pins and needles. She his lips responding and began to kiss back, slowly and gently. Her mouth parted slightly as she found herself almost unable to keep control.

"No!"

Arthur shoved her away for a second, his eyes filling with tears. She knew a wall he had kept up ever since whatever happened when he had dealt with his wife's murderer, now this wall was starting to crumble down, she knew if she didn't reach him now nobody ever would. Ariadne understood the guilt in his pain filled eyes. Slowly she reached forward and touched his face with her fingertips.

"It's okay..."

Arthur stared at her as her hand gently cupped the side of his face and slowly began to rub his skin. Staring at him, her own eyes began to become blurred with tears. She now honestly knew how lonely he had been, and how haunted and heartbroken his mind was ever since his life was shattered. Ariadne took a deep breath before taking a step closer, she looked up at him, pressing her body against his. She felt his chest slowly rise and fall as he breathed in heavy drawn out breaths.

"It's okay Arthur...just let go..."

Arthur closed his eyes in pain before Ariadne stood on her tip toes and pressed her lips against his mouth. Right away Arthur's hand found hers and their fingers interlaced. Squeezing it, Ariadne kept Arthur's kisses become more of a frenzy. His tongue gently slipped into her mouth before his other hand wrapped around her and held the back of her head. Moaning, Ariadne almost moaned before Arthur slowly began to lower her to the floor. Clutching onto him and not stopping the deep kisses she couldn't seem to stop from happening, Ariadne felt herself lay against the cool tile floor as Arthur's weight got on top of her. Laying on top of her, Arthur began kissing down her neck, gently sucking and nipping her skin. Trying to control herself. Ariadne stared up at the ceiling. Novak, the dog stared at them puzzled for a moment before walking out of the room. The sound of his paws clicking filled the air before all that Ariadne honestly could hear was the sound of rainwater and Arthur's heartbeat.

Ariadne felt Arthur's long slender legs lay between hers, that's when Ariadne knew for sure what she wanted.

"Make love to me..."

She whispered in a breathless moan. Right away her hands went to his shirt and began rubbing the fabric of his shirt, wanting so badly to touch his skin. Arthur didn't take much time, reaching down he fumbled against the button of Ariadne's slacks.

"Let me..."

Ariadne's hands nervously began to unbutton the slacks and work down the fly when Arthur's hand grabbed her breast and squeezed it. Laying there, Ariadne shut her eyes as Arthur reached down and began to pull away her clothes. Feeling her heart race she allowed him to undress them. Her mind was somewhere completely else. Feeling his lips against her skin and his tongue running down her neck, suddenly Ariadne felt very hot. Arthur within seconds had begin working on his belt. Ariadne blindly reached up and began trying to undo the buttons of his shirt. Hearing his slacks unzipper. Ariadne opened her eyes, letting reality set in that this was really happening. The next thing she knew, Arthur's boxers and slacks were down around his ankles and half her blouse was undone revealing her lace bra. His hands were all over her, squeezing her breasts and rubbing her tender skin. She felt his weight fully lay on her before his own legs began making her own spread. He kept kissing her, making it harder and harder to breath. Ariadne was scared, but couldn't felt how excited her body felt.

She felt it, graze against her inner thigh. She was nervous but knew this was it. She just wanted to look at him. Holding onto his shoulders she stared up at him as he guided himself into her. Taking a second, Arthur gritted his teeth and pushed himself into her. Ariadne gave a stiffened cry as her eyes widened. Arthur snapped his eyes shut, trying to pace himself before sliding himself completely into her. His wait pressed up against hers, he settled for a second before giving a thrust. Ariadne snapped her eyes shut and cried out, the pain was horrible. Taking a second she tried to get her body to relax before Arthur went into her again. Ariadne laid there before as Arthur propped himself on top of her, his arms out holding himself up on each side of him. Staring down at her, he gave another thrust before finding his pace. Ariadne felt the pain starting to numb away. Laying back she laid there against the hard tile floor as he began thrusting away as quick as he could. Laying there, Ariadne suddenly felt a feeling she never could have even dreamed about. Her back arching, her mouth opened but no words escaped. Everything felt like pins and needles, moaning, she gripped onto his shoulders,a wonderful mixture of pain and pleasure overwhelmed her as she felt light headed. Clutching onto him, Ariadne reached up and held the sides of his face.

"I want to look at you."

She said, staring up at him, his shirt now half way unbuttoned. Arthur stared down at her, his face slightly flushed before he thrusted again. Ariadne stiffened staring up at him before he leaned down and covered her mouth with his. Kissing him deeply, the same wonderful feeling returned, making her squirm underneath him as he moved inside of her. Feeling short of breath, she moaned in-between their mouths and felt herself beginning to spiral out of control. Arthur found a pace and continued to go into her, his weight completely crushing her. Ariadne no longer felt embarrassed nor exposed. This was something they were sharing just the two of them.

Moaning, Ariadne couldn't take the rubbing warm feeling that was traveling up her body, her legs slightly going around his waist, she tilted her head back and began to moan loud enough to wake the dead.

At that exact moment Arthur opened his eyes, he knew he couldn't hold off much longer, staring down his eyes widened.

It wasn't Ariadne laying beneath him anymore, it was Regan. Her hair pooling around the floor and her wide blue eyes staring up at him. Arthur paused for a second and blinked. He couldn't believe it.

She laid there, softly smiling up at him. Arthur's eyes filled with tears as he stared down at his wife in disbelief.

"You...came back."

He softly said.

Regan's eyebrow raised almost in confusion before reaching and touching the side of his face.

"What?"

Arthur leaned down, not allowing her to finish and deeply kissed her. He wouldn't let her go this time, he couldn't.

Ariadne kissed Arthur back, she didn't hear what he just said, she was too busy trying not to pass out from this wonderful new feeling that was rushing through her body. Kissing Arthur back, she laid there as he silently pumped into her before beginning to slow. Her hand laid at her side but Arthur found it again and squeezed it, a few thrusts later Arthur buried his face into her shoulder and stiffened. Ariadne opened her eyes and stared up as he gave a grunt and warmth filled her. Laying there she felt him go down the insides of her thighs as he dully thrusted a few more times before arching his own back and staying in the same position for a moment.

It was over.

Arthur raised his head, his hair slightly a mess as he stared down at her.

Instead of Regan he found Ariadne laying there and his heart broke.

"Jesus..."

Reality hit him all at once as Ariadne softly smiled up at him, pulling out as quick as he could, Ariadne snapped her eyes shut from the pain as he stood up, struggling to pull up his boxers and slacks. Ariadne laid there slightly surprised as he hurried to dress himself.

"Arthur?"

Arthur looked down and saw blood, right away he couldn't believe what he had done. Feeling sick to his stomach he shook his head and hurried out of the kitchen.

"I shouldn't have done that...I'm sorry..."

Hurrying out of the room, Arthur ran down the hallway towards his bedroom. Slamming the door behind him he locked it and felt a complete loss of breath. Standing there everything rushed at him at once. He had just had sex with another woman. Slowly, he collapsed against the door and silently began to cry.

At that exact moment Ariadne hiked herself up, confused and scared. Laying there in the middle of the kitchen she stared down at herself and felt disgusted. Slowly, she pulled up her slacks and looked around the empty kitchen. She would try to talk to him, if he didn't want to see her she perfectly understood. She should have told him first. Sighing, she wondered if she could call for a taxi to bring her to her sister's.

Standing, she right away felt dull cramps in her lower part of her body. She wanted a shower more than anything at that exact moment. Looking around she sighed.

She wasn't a virgin anymore.

_**2007**_

Arthur stared at his own reflection in his bathroom mirror and felt sick to his stomach.

Washing his hands in the sink, he watched as steaming hot water sprayed down on his bloody hands. The gloves he had worn were now off and sitting on the counter beside him. Scrubbing his hands, he saw blood had gotten under his fingernails. Looking at himself, he saw how pale and dead he looked.

The shotgun was leaning against the back of the door.

He had finished it.

The gun was unmarked and there wouldn't be any trace, he had been careful when he left Dr. Anderson's home, and now he stood there scrubbing his blood off his hands. He couldn't exact remember what happened, but he did know that before he pulled the trigger he had asked why he had taken his wife and baby away from him. Dr. Anderson died on his knees begging for his life, telling him he was wrong, that he had made some mistake. Arthur just stared down at him with blank emotionless eyes before pulling the trigger. The sound had been loud and the mess was horrible, most of it splattered back before he watched the doctor fall. Some sick bastard who deserved to suffer much more.

He had stared down at the body for what seemed like a lifetime, not feeling a thing before turning.

That's when he ran right into a little girl.

She was no older than six, she wore a nightgown and held a teddy bear. She looked up at Arthur.

"Where's my daddy?"

Arthur hadn't known Anderson had children, most likely from his first marriage. He wouldn't have done it here if he had known. Staring down at the little girl he no longer cared if he got caught. It was finished and he felt completely empty. His wife was dead, and as far as he concerned, his life was completely over. Looking at the little girl he felt nothing but pity. Her father, who was most likely her hero was nothing but a sick raspiest who killed a pregnant woman who begged for her life. Looking at the little girl he wondered what his daughter would have looked like if she had lived.

"Hell, he's in hell."

He said in a dry voice before walking past her, he stared forward, the gun still in his hands as the little girl began to scream behind him.

He was home now and knew that most likely the police would be coming soon. So he waited.

He finished washing his hands and picked up the shotgun, he would go downstairs and sit in the dark until he heard them come. Looking at the gun, he wondered if it would be better if he just blew his own head off before they knocked down the door. Maybe then this horrible pain would be finally over.

Walking down the hallway where his wife had been raped and killed, he slowly went down the stairs and into the dark living room. He knew he should have made Anderson tell him why Regan? Why had he decided to take this sweet beautiful young woman's life. Why out of all the other patents he had he chose her. A woman he had helped before. Why had he wanted to take Regan? Didn't he know she was his whole world?

"Hello Arthur?"

Arthur spun around, gun raised and aimed.

Two men stood in his living room, both in suits and one much older than the other. Arthur stood there ready to fire when the younger man raised his hand.

"Mind putting the weapon down?"

Arthur's eye twitched as he aimed the gun right at them.

"Who the hell are you?"

"My name is Cobb, this is my father in-law Miles."

The man with the white hair nodded, his hands folded and his face perfectly calm in the dark.

"What are you doing here?"

"We came to see you and offer you bargain for your talents."

"What?"

"We've been flowing you for some time Arthur..."

A smooth beautiful voice said behind him. Arthur spun around, the gun still aimed and saw a beautiful woman with lovely brown hair and big blue eyes standing behind him.

"Who are you people?"

"We're from a certain project that specialize in your major."

"Which is?"

"Dreams."

"What?"

The man named Cobb walked closer.

"For the past several years we've been working on a secret project that probably half the world will never know about. We've been searching for the most talented people around who have made advancements in dream research to build our team."

Arthur blinked, he couldn't believe what he was saying.

"What?"

"We know you just killed the man who murdered your wife."

Arthur just stood there as Cobb nodded towards the shotgun that was aimed at him.

"With that exact gun right?"

Arthur didn't say anything as Cobb went on.

"We know what happened, and believe me nobody here is going to judge you for what you did to that bastard. The thing is, you need our help and we need yours."

"What do you mean?"

"There was a little girl there when it happened, the doctor's daughter right?"

Arthur didn't say anything but it was more enough of an answer for Cobb.

"She won't be able to remember nor describe the man who killed her daddy. She's four years old, she'll say he was tall and dark and beyond that her fragile little mind won't be able to wrap around what happened. The police of course will question everyone counting you. Which is why we're here to give you an ability."

Arthur stared at him with unsure eyes.

"I don't care if I get caught. I killed him for what he did, nothing else matters."

"What if I told you that if you joined us and accepted our help that you would be able to work on something beyond anyone's own mind. To see and create a world where anything could happen...

"You're crazy..."

The woman walked behind Arthur and nodded.

"Exactly, and so aren't you. We'll make the perfect team."

Arthur stared at the three strangers in his living room and slowly lowered the gun, he was to exhausted to care anymore. Cobb and Miles eyed each other before nodding.

_**2010**_

"Arthur?"

Ariadne gently knocked on the closed door, her insides still dully cramping. The rain was pouring outside and on the skylights above she saw them splatter against the glass.

"Arthur, can I come in?"

She asked again, after a moment or two Arthur's voice cam from the other side of the door. Horsed and low, right away she knew he had been crying.

"Umm, listen I'm sorta tired. There's a spare room down the hall. There's towels in the bathroom. I think I'm just going to lay down for a while."

Ariadne made a face and softly smiled.

"Arthur, you just had a ten hour nap...come on please let me in."

She paused, waiting for a response but there was nothing. Sighing she wanted to slap herself for how stupid she was. Arthur was dealing with more things that she could even begin to think about. He had sex with her, and more than likely she was the first woman he had been with since his mother had died. Right away she hated the fact that this was her first time. It was beyond anything she had ever thought it would be like, yet felt guilty and dirty due to the heartbreak she saw in Arthur's eyes when he left her. Knowing it was a mistake, she took a deep breath and leaned against the door.

"Please Arthur, please let me in."

The door then opened a crack, Arthur stood there, dark circles under his eyes. He stares at her as she nervously bit her lip. He looked her up and down before saying...

"You okay?"

Ariadne thought about this for a moment before nodding.

"Yeah I'm fine, what about you?"

Arthur shrugged before looking down at his shoes.

"Umm, did I...well did I hurt you?"

Ariadne shook her head and reached forward, pulling the door open.

"No, of course you didn't."

Arthur lifted his eyes and stared at her.

"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me..."

Ariadne then pushed forward and leaned forward and gently kissed his cheek. Wrapping her arms around him she held him close and nuzzled against his chest.

"I know this sounds stupid, but I feel safe whenever I'm around you...please don't push me away."

"Ariadne..."

He began to say before she looked up at him.

"I'll go if you want me to."

Arthur shook his head, his eyes locked with hers.

"No, I don't want you to."

"You still miss her don't you?"

Arthur slowly nodded before Ariadne put her head on his chest.

"Stay with me Arthur, just for tonight. I can't be alone."

Arthur put his arms slowly around her before kissing the top of her head.

A few minutes later Ariadne was in the spare bedroom undressing, Arthur was in his bedroom and said he wanted to take a quick shower. Things hadn't been awkward, but she knew he needed to be alone for a little bit. She could tell he was crying and didn't want to do that in front of her. Unzipping her bag and taking her clothes out, she heard the sound of running water and turned.

She loved him.

It sounded funny to say since she honestly really didn't know him, but it was true. Thinking back to the kitchen her stomach began to flutter with butterflies. Smiling, she ran her hands down her naked body and over her breasts. She was a woman now, and she really couldn't have picked a better person to change that for her. She didn't know if Arthur felt anything towards her, but she did know the thought of never seeing him again scared her to death. Smiling, she stared at her reflection in the dresser mirror and thought about Cobb. She hoped he had found peace...

Now she wanted to find hers.

Slipping on her short robe, she tied it and let her hair fall back over her shoulders. Taking a deep breath she eyed the door.

Walking out of the room, she went down the hall and opened Arthur's bedroom door. Hearing the shower going, she took a deep breath as her heart pounded in her chest. She really didn't know if she was being stupid for not. She hoped he wouldn't be angry and push her away. Sighing she went to the bathroom door and pushed it open. Steam floated in the air from the running water and she saw Arthur behind the sliding glass doors to the shower. Standing in the doorway she watched him and smiled.

He was perfect.

She could make out only his basic form on the other side of the fogged up glass. He was lean and tall, but completely flawless. Feeling those weird pin prick feelings again enter her body, she slowly undid her robe and let it fall off her to the floor. Looking over, she saw he had folded his clothes in neat order on the counter along with his shoes and watch. Smiling, she slid the glass door open.

Arthur was there, underneath the shower head. At first he looked slightly surprised as Ariadne stood there completely naked. His eyes looked her up and down as the hot beads of water ran down his body and slicked back hair.

"Hi."

Ariadne said before stepping inside and sliding the glass door shut behind her. Standing there in the small area of the shower, she looked up a him and honestly couldn't tell if he was angry or not. Arthur looked down at her again before meeting her eyes. Ariadne reached forward and touched his chest.

Arthur stared at her before standing back, his eyes almost in pain. Ariadne didn't know if getting in here with him was smart or not, right away the pouring water from above began to drench her hair. Taking a second Arthur reached forward and gathered her in his arms. Pulling her close he held her tight.

"Arthur?"

She asked.

Arthur held her underneath the water before kissing the top of her ear, slowly he raised her head and stared at her before kissing her. Ariadne smiled through the kiss before her hand went down to his stomach. Rubbing it, her fingers slowly traveled down to his waist and then found his penis. Touching it lightly, she saw Arthur's reaction as he stiffened for a second and held back a gasp. She honestly didn't know what she was doing, but felt as if she was going to attack him if she held back any longer.

Arthur smiled before leaning down and rubbing his nose against hers. Smiling, Ariadne kissed him.

Leaning in close to her, Arthur kissed her shoulder blade gently.

"Oh Regan..."

Right away both noticed it and Arthur stood up straight, shutting his eyes he shook his head.

"Jesus..."

He went to pull away when Ariadne held onto his arms, right away she noticed how muscular they were in a lean skinny sort of way. Pressing her fingertips into his skin, she made him look at her.

"It's okay..."

Arthur shook his head under the water.

"No, it's not...I shouldn't be doing this..."

Ariadne reached up and grabbed the sides of his face and forced him to look at her.

"Listen, I know you miss her. I bet you miss her more than anything in the whole world...but it's okay, you need to come back to the world of the living Arthur, please."

Arthur looked at her and shook his head.

"Please stop..."

Ariadne shook her head and leaned up again and kissed him.

"Feel that? It's life, please...don't push me away."

Arthur stared down at her before taking a second. Sighing, he shook his head again and pushed her away.

"This is a mistake..."

Opening up the glass door, Arthur stepped out dripping wet. Ariadne right away stopped the water and stood looking at him as he grabbed a towel and wrapped it around his waist.

"I love you Arthur!"

She couldn't stop the words as they escaped her lips. Arthur turned and almost glared at her as water ran down his back.

"You don't even know me..."

With that he walked out, leaving Ariadne alone with tears ready to fall from her eyes.

_**2007**_

"I sure am going to miss you..."

Bettina said as Arthur stood on his front porch with his hands shoved in his front pockets. It was late afternoon and a for sale sign hung on the front lawn. It had been a total of two months since Dr. Anderson's death.

Softly smiling, he looked at his neighbor before glancing over his shoulder at the house.

"I'm surprised it sold this quickly."

Bettina waved her hand.

"Please, my son has had his eye on this pretty little house for as long as I can remember. Him and his new girlfriend will just love having me right next door so I can cook for them every night."

Arthur smiled.

"Yeah, it's a good house...lots of good memories..."

He remembered all of them. This was the house him and his wife had shared. This was the house he planned on living in with her for the rest of his life.

The police like clockwork had come over a few days later to question Arthur. Some of the officers had worked on Regan's case and knew Arthur. They sat down in the living room asking where he had been. Arthur stayed perfectly calm drinking coffee with the police and told them he was working on some research with one of his fellow friends from NYU who came down that weekend. He gave the number Cobb had given him and told the police he was thinking about starting up his classes again or relocate to a new school, maybe in Europe. The officers were friendly enough and Arthur played his part acting shocked when he heard about Dr. Anderson's death.

"When was the last time you spoke with Dr. Anderson."

Arthur sat there pretending to think, holding his coffee mug.

"Umm, a little while after my wife's funeral. He came to pay his respects, he didn't stay long."

The officers nodded taking notes, Arthur watched this and sighed shaking his head.

"I didn't know him well but he did help my wife a few months before she passed away. He was helped with her surgery and was truly a nice guy."

The officers explained it seemed to be a break-in. That's when they showed Arthur the sketch of what his daughter who was home at the time described the intruder to be. For a moment Arthur held his breath but the second the officer handed him the sketch he couldn't believe how much Cobb had been right.

The sketch he held was a drawing of a large black man with a ski cap on. The officers shook their heads.

"She's only four but this was the most we got out of her, God knows this is even what the guy looked like. Strange this was, nothing was missing from the home. We believe the intruder panicked when Anderson's daughter came out and ran."

Arthur nodded before handing the sketch back before looking at the cops.

"You don't think this is connected in anyway to..."

They shook their heads.

"Not at all, but believe me we have our best men still working on your wife's case. Any leads whatsoever you'll be the first to know."

Arthur held back, deep inside his mind he found humor in this and couldn't believe how easy it all seemed. Anderson was a sick obsessive man who hated the fact that Regan wasn't his. So his process of thinking was if he couldn't have her, then nobody could. This cost Arthur his wife and his unborn daughter. Now he had to live the rest of his life without her and the fact that no matter how hard he scrubbed and washed...he still had a man's blood on his hands.

Anderson was dead, but it still honestly hadn't done anything.

They talked a bit more and finally they left, shaking Arthur's hands and giving him looks filled with pity before leaving. Alone in his empty house, Arthur leaned against the door and sighed before rubbing his face.

He had killed a man, yet felt nothing.

That night he met with Cobb and Mal, they brought him to a warehouse outside of town where they wanted to show him something they described that would truly blow his mind.

As Mal set up, Arthur stood back feeling sick. He had watched Cobb and his wife the entire evening and felt jealous. It wasn't fair so many other men still had their wife's while he was alone. Regan was dead and buried and even though he had killed the sick bastard who had taken her away from him...nothing seemed to help.

"You okay?"

Cobb asked.

Arthur folded his arms and looked at him.

"I killed a man and got away with it. Guess it really hasn't set in yet."

"It takes time, your human that's why."

Arthur raised an eyebrow before Cobb nodded.

"Let's just say I've had my share of bloodshed, but only for good cause. You'll notice in this line of work, it happens once or twice. It's nothing you can control."

Arthur stood there as Mal brought out a silver suitcase.

"You know, a few months ago I was just a grad student who was perfectly happy living with my wife, completely numb to the rest of the world. Now, that's all gone...and I'm running around with you guys who in all honestly I don't even know what you want from me."

Cobb looked at Arthur and smiled before patting him on the back.

"You'll soon see."

Arthur looked at him.

"You know I really wouldn't have cared if I got caught for killing Anderson."

"Of course not. He was a sick bastard who killed your wife in cold blood. There's a saying that once you lose everything that you hold close to your heart, the last thing to really feel is the heart itself."

"Do you believe that?"

Cobb watched Mal and sighed.

"I honestly can't compare myself to you. I have a beautiful wife who's my best friend and two amazing children. I've killed before, but never for revenge. That's something that stays with you forever."

"Then why me? Why choose me?"

"Because we see the talent you have. You're one of the few people who can dream past reality and know that if you push your mind towards it you can make anything happen. We've followed your research and now we want to give you a chance to do something...your life was taken away, we want to give some of it back."

"How?"

"We're going to show you how to build worlds...come on."

Sighing, Arthur followed Cobb as they began to sit down in the chairs that were sitting in the center of the room. Mal took out what appeared to be wires connected to needles.

"Ever shoot a gun before?"

Cobb asked. Arthur, who just sat down looked at him completely puzzled.

"Huh?"

_**Later...**_

Arthur's eyes opened at the same exact moment as Cobb. Mal stood by the suitcase and smiled as Arthur blinked.

"Jesus..."

Sitting up it took him a second before Cobb smiled.

"Welcome to our world."

Arthur couldn't explain exactly what happened, only that for the first time since Regan died it had been a complete escape from the horrible aching grief he had been feeling since her death. Rubbing the back of his neck he nervously smiled at Cobb.

"We have a lot to teach you."

A month later Arthur put the house up for sale. Bettina's son bought it right away and Arthur told everyone the same lie. He was planning on living in Europe for a while, a research team was interested in the progress he was making with his studies. He explained to Sara that he just wanted time away from everything. He was still grieving pretty bad and just wanted to focus on work.

The truth was he was running away.

He had read about Anderson's story in the newspaper, but didn't bother to follow it. Instead he visited Cobb and Mal three times a week where they slowly schooled him on the process of dream making. In these dreams it was true, you could make your own world and become lost with it.

It was a wonderful escape to the cold reality he faced every time he woke. Soon he had his totem, and was able to control what his mind wanted to see more clearer.

Once he was in a dream with Cobb and Mal and he found himself on his street mid afternoon. He walked with them when he stopped in front of his house and the worst feeling over came him. The three of them went inside and what they found caused Arthur to nearly have a nervous breakdown. When he woke Cobb and extremely stern to tell him he needed to control what he saw in the dream, If not it could attack them. From that point onward, Arthur slowly began to master his control even though he deeply wished he could see Regan again.

In his spare time he packed up his boxers and said goodbye to the house that Regan and himself bought together and had lived in up until her death. The house they had made their own, and the same house she was raped and murdered in. He needed to get rid of the past before it destroyed him. Packing up her things broke his heart, but he needed to escape it before it ate him away.

He was planning on leaving and never looking back.

One one of his last evenings he was at his home, everything was packed up in boxes, Either ready to go with him or go into storage. Standing there, he looked down the now empty hallway.

This was the place where his life truly ended.

Slowly walking over he knelt down before laying his body down completely on the bare wood floor. Sighing, he brushed his fingertips against the floor and began to cry.

_**2010**_

Ariadne found Arthur in his bedroom dressed in a pair of black sweatpants and the towel now around his neck as he sat on the edge of the bed, his head in his hands. Making sure her robe was tied, she stood in the doorway for a moment before Arthur looked up at her, his eyes exhausted.

"I'm sorry..."

Ariadne slowly walked over before sitting beside him, her hand gently going around him her fingertips touched his bare back and began to rub it.

"You don't have to be sorry..."

Arthur sat there for a moment before shaking his head. Sniffling, he shook his head.

"I just miss her so much, I know it's been years but...I just can't stop thinking about it."

"Of course not, you loved her..."

Arthur stared at her.

"I'll never forget, I kept thinking that maybe the pain could go away. That revenge would make everything go back to normal, but it's not true. I could do millions of this jobs, pull off the impossible, stay in those dream states for hours on end and still, still know whenever I wake up she won't be here."

"You loved her, that's why..."

"You know, I understood how much pain Cobb went through when Mal died. I really did, but at least he had children. I know he had to leave them, but at least he still had something to live for. I wish he could have been more honest about how bad he was after she died. I know of all people I shouldn't be the one giving advice but, I learned how to push those horrible thoughts away so it wouldn't put others in danger."

"How?"

"You keep them locked up, only when your alone in the dream you let them loose."

"Then show me."

"What?"

Ariadne stared at him.

"Cobb had to face what was haunting him, now you do."

Arthur shook his head.

"It's nothing like that..."

"But it still haunts you, Arthur you're dying on the inside I cans see it. Please don't push me away."

Staring at her, Arthur took a deep breath before Ariadne placed her head on his shoulder and kissed his skin. Wrapping her arms around him, she nuzzled him.

"Don't worry, you're not alone."


	9. Chapter 9

Arthur left Ariadne when suddenly out of nowhere his nose began to bleed. Ariadne saw the dark blood dribble out and begin traveling down towards his upper lip. Right away Arthur felt it and cupped his hand to it.

"Jesus..."

He mumbled before standing up and heading back towards the bathroom.

"Are you okay?"

Ariadne started but Arthur quickly waved her away, trying to tilt his head back.

"I'm fine, just give me a second..."

Hearing water run in the bathroom, Ariadne sat alone on the bed hearing the rain outside. At this exact moment she honestly didn't know where she was. Of course physically she knew where she was, she was at Arthur's home in California, she had just taken a ten hour flight and in those ten hours went past and well beyond her wildest dream. Now in those few hours since they landed so much had changed.

In a moment of complete weakness she had sex with Arthur. He had been her first, and it was nothing at all like she thought it would be. Thinking back to those eight or so minutes on the kitchen floor, she couldn't explain what had happened between the two of them. She now understood that Arthur was just as complex as Cobb, and had a lot of pain hidden behind those dark eyes of his.

Sitting there she couldn't believe she told him she loved him. Sighing, she sat back dressed in her robe feeling like a child. She shouldn't have been so forward. Sighing, she listened to the running water and knew that much like Cobb, Arthur had a lot of things he kept hidden. He was much better at keeping those things under control, but she sensed his past was beginning to overwhelm him.

Getting up, Ariadne rubbed her hands over her legs nervously before walking to the bathroom. She knew he needed time to rest, and she really wanted was for him to find enough focus to maybe let her in a little bit. She now understood that Arthur was alone, and it was killing him on the inside.

"Arthur..."

She froze in the doorway.

Arthur stood at the sink fumbling with a bottle of pills. His nose was still bleeding and his hands shaking. Right away the pills slipped out of his hand and fell to the ground, the bottle rolled across the room right to Ariadne's bare feet.

Raising an eyebrow, Ariadne bent down and picked up the bottle, slowly turning it in her hands.

Arthur looked surprised, and quickly wiped his nose again before Ariadne's eyes looked up at him.

"What is this?"

Arthur sighed looking at her and then the bottle of pills.

'

"I'm dying Ariadne."

_**2008**_

Eames stood back slightly amused as Arthur stepped forward on the empty city street and raised his machine gun.

"Well, well, well look at this darling. Seems as though the young cap has gotten a little power under his belt huh?"

Smirking, Arthur aimed the gun and began firing at the street lamps in perfect order. Once his clip was finished, he held the gun back against his shoulder and smiled at Eames who laughed and began to clap his hands.

Moments later they woke up.

They were in the lab, and were working yet again on research for their latest project.

Mal was sitting at the desk smiling, her beautiful face something wonderful to stare at.

"Good morning my lovelies."

Arthur blinked before reaching into his pocket for his dice, rolling it in his fingers he took a second before reaching into his shirt and touching his wedding band that now hung from a chair around his neck. Knowing he was fully awake he sat up cracking his neck and looking around. Mal sat at the desk, pregnant and wonderful looking.

Cobb stood beside her looking over files and for a brief moment Arthur felt nothing but jealousy. Sighing, he eyed Eames who sat forward smiling.

"Well kids, what's next on the list."

Arthur truly couldn't believe he had been doing this for nearly a year now. He had relocated to Europe and had pretty much cut off all contact from his past. Now he moved wherever there was a job. The more he began to process the shared dreaming, the better he got an understanding. Mal and Cobb were making groundbreaking finds in it, and slowly they were beginning to get hired onto more complex and serious jobs.

Cobb now called Arthur their point-man. His speed, knowledge, and background in dream study were starting to really pay off.

He traveled non-stop and began to let this job become his life. He wouldn't dare allow himself to stop for even a second, whenever he did that he found himself alone, and thinking of her.

Watching Cobb and Mal, he hated the fact he watched them with envy. Looking at Mal's perfectly round stomach his heart broke silently. Cobb and Mal were expecting their second child, a boy.

Sitting there he sighed before Cobb walked over.

"A letter came for you today..."

Arthur raised an eyebrow.

"From who? 

Cobb shrugged.

"Don't know it was here when we got in, no return address."

Opening up the letter, right away Arthur's stomach twisted up.

What he held in his hands was a newspaper article.

_**Local doctor Philip Anderson Swann murdered in cold blood!**_

Arthur felt his heart skip a beat. Scanning the article he saw someone had circled the word 'murdered' with red marker and below it read...

**HE DIDN'T KILL HER, WE DID.**

Arthur couldn't stop re-reading the same article over and over again. Looking at the small black and white photo of Anderson, he felt his heart begin to race. That's when Cobb walked over, his face slightly puzzled.

'What's wrong Arthur? You look like you've seen a ghost."

Arthur as if he was floating in a dream slowly handed the article to Cobb who took it from him and began to read. Right away Arthur felt short of breath and sick to his stomach. Looking down at his friend, his expression said it all.

"Jesus..."

_**2010**_

"What do you mean dying?"

Ariadne said, panic rising in her voice.

Arthur walked over, calmly taking the pills from her.

"I have a tumor, near the frontal lobe of my brain, the few doctor's I've been too believe something may be linked to this, but I all ready know."

'What?"

"I've been straining my mind to keep those horrible thoughts away so they wouldn't harm anyone. I'm like Cobb, but before I learned to keep them locked up, I was out of control."

"Wait, so you're telling me that just because your keeping these protections, these memories and thoughts hidden whenever you go under, it's created a tumor?"

"It might have been there before, all I know is it's been here for the past year or so and it gets bad whenever I'm under for too long."

"What have the doctor's said?"

Arthur shrugged.

"I don't know, I haven't been to any in the last six months."

"Jesus Arthur!"

Arthur stared at her, wiping the last of the blood away from his face.

"I've learned to deal with this myself. I locked them away and I keep them away. It's the only way I can live with it."

"Do you use these dreams as an escape, as a reminder like Cobb did?"

Arthur shook his head.

"Once and while some memories slip through, but it always ends the same. Regan's still dead and I still have blood on my hands."

"What do you mean?"

"The man I thought was responsible for my wife's death...the one I killed in cold blood...he was the wrong person."

Ariadne sighed as Arthur began washing his hands.

"The people who killed my wife, they set it up to make it look like that man did it. My own mind took over the rest. I put together the carefully placed clues, and I saw it happen in my head over and over again. Finally when I did take my revenge, only later did I find out the truth."

"The truth?"

"The people who founded the shared dreaming was originally from the military, that's who if you really break it down, Cobb and myself work for. There's no other company or department who even know about it, besides a few...we don't exactly know who they are, but they know about our operation. They much like Cobb, had been following my research at grad school and wanted me first. They researched my life, followed me and my wife and finally found the perfect way to get in."

"How?"

"My wife's doctor, he was in love with Regan, obsessed maybe. I honestly think he would have been harmless and wouldn't have done anything. But they took him as decided to make it look like he was the one who broke in, raped and murdered her...they waited for me to put the clues together and were going to do exactly what Cobb and his team beat them to do first."

"Which was?"

"Let me lose it, kill in cold blood and need a coverup. Need somewhere to turn. So they waited but they were too late. Cobb and his team really did want to help me, so they got there first and helped me cover my tracks and join their team. I meanwhile killed an innocent man while this other team saw they had missed their chance. They had gone in, raped and killed my wife and tried to frame it on my wife's doctor. They wanted my wind to put together the pieces and I would kill them and they would magically come to the rescue."

"Jesus..."

"I only found out nearly a year later after I left behind everything I knew and was working for Cobb. This unknown team contacted me and let me know without a doubt that I had killed and innocent man in cold blood in front of his own child. They wanted me to question myself and not trust anyone, least of all Cobb. But once I came to terms with the truth, I understood that Cobb and his team were the ones who truly cares. They were the ones who saved me. I could very much have been fooled into working for the same bastards who killed my wife."

"So, they had your wife killed just so you could..."

"Work for them and become their point man. That's why this entire thing has become my entire life. It's what destroyed me in the first place..."

"Did you ever find out who killed her?"

Arthur shook his head.

"Cobb and Eames tried to help me but we never found out. I think it's safe to say my wife's murder will never be found for the rest of my life at least. It's funny, my mind saw her doctor be the one to do it, I dreamed in my wife's point of view after her death over and over again and it made perfect sense. But the truth is some unknown stranger broke in and killed her, and I killed a sick, yet harmless man in front of his own child."

"How did you deal with it?"

"I threw myself into work. The projections and memories kept coming, but I forced them away and learned t deal with them so nobody would ever be in danger."

"Do you ever see your wife in your dreams?"

"Once and a while, but I think I've put so much energy into forcing them away...that's the reason I've been so sick."

"Then stop, I mean look at you."

"Today was my last job for good. I'm done pretending. Now I'm just planning on spending the little time I have left in peace."

"Arthur your a young man, you're brilliant, handsome, kind, you have so much going for you. Why give up and have your past haunt you to the point you don't even want to live?"

Arthur glared at her.

"Because I'm tired, because my wife died because of me. I killed a man in cold blood, and the whole thing that surrounds my life is the reason it was destroyed. I'm sure forcing these memories away and learning how to control it really hasn't been the cause of me being sick, but it's been wearing down on me. I'm just so tired...I want it to be over and I don't want to wake up."

Ariadne took a step closer.

"You were the main reason we all woke up today...you."

"That doesn't change or prove anything. All I know is that I'm done, retired. Cobb is at peace and with his family. Everyone is on their own now and safe. I just want to be alone and put this all behind me."

"Alone, you really don't mean that."

"But I do."

"Arthur...I love you."

"STOP SAYING THAT!"

Arthur snapped, causing Ariadne to jump back slightly. Holding his head, Arthur took a deep breath.

"I shouldn't of had sex with you, it was a mistake."

"Why? Because you feel guilty? Arthur, I didn't know your wife but I'm sure she wouldn't have wanted to see you live like this."

"I shouldn't have slept with you because you formed attachment. Ariadne your a sweet person, but I can't do this...'

"Show me your dream."

"What?"

"If you've mastered, holding back and controlling your thoughts all this time, then finally let go. Open up and let me see. Cobb allowed it and he was finally able to let go of the guilt of his wife..."

"It's nothing like that..."

"No it isn't. Because you very much could have put our life's in danger while we were under. I know you could have, but you protected us and helped us make it back up. Your strong minded, but this is eating away at you. The memory of you're wife's murder, the fact you killed the wrong man, the grief...the guilt. You need to let someone in before it's too late."

"Ariadne I don't care! I don't want to let anyone see the things I have up in here!"

He tapped against his temper, his face becoming flushed.

"I'm too fucked up, just leave me alone!"

"No."

"Why? Because you think you love me? Jesus Ariadne we've only known each other for a few months..."

"Then what about that kiss?"

"What kiss?"

"The one in your dream..."

Arthur rolled his eyes.

"I was being an idiot, come on..."

"No, I can see you're lonely. Maybe you don't love me, I wouldn't blame you. We are pretty much strangers and I know for a fact I could never be half the woman your wife was. But your my friend...and despite anything, this entire morning we've shared more than two people could even think of. You saved my life Arthur and even if you do want to push me away, even if I do leave tonight and never see or hear from you again...I think you should let me see what's killing you on the inside."

"What difference would it make?"

"Because you've lost the will to live."

"You don't want to see what's in my head..."

"Maybe I do."

Arthur tilted his head back sighing before Ariadne reached forward and touched his bare arm.

"After we do this, even if it's just for a few minutes I promise I'll go..."

"Ariadne..."

"No, I promise I'll leave you alone. If this is what you really want, to die alone...then I'll respect that. Just please, let me just see."

"It's bad Ariadne, it's been built up for too long, and after what we've been through..."

"Arthur please...just let me see."

"Ariadne I don't want you to go but..."

"Arthur please, just let me look, I need to know...it's sad but you men have been more family to me than my own would ever be. Please..."

Sighing, Arthur looked down before rubbing the back of his neck.

"It's funny, this is the first time I've talked about this...since well, for a long time."

"How long did you look for your wife's murder?"

"A little over a year, Eames believe it or not was bound and determined to find them. Like I said, we were originally based off the military, there are only several other somewhat known teams who work with extraction, but their whereabouts have never fully been known. Finally I just reached the point I no longer cared. Look at what revenge got me."

"So what is in your subconscious?"

Arthur leaned against the counter.

"Enough things you truly make you question why Cobb and I worked on this team to begin with."

"Then let me see..."

" Ariadne, I'm very tired. I think I'm going to lay down for a while...you're welcome to more than anything, and please stay the night. Tomorrow like I promised I'll take you to your sister's. A lot has happened...and I think we just need to rest."

With that Arthur slipped past her leaving the room. Taking a second Ariadne sighed before turning towards the medicine chest. Pausing, she slid the mirror open and looked. There were bottles upon bottles of pills.

There had been a secret Arthur had kept hidden...

He had been sick for sometime now.

She honestly wondered if keeping these memories and thoughts really had something to do with him being so sick. Thinking back to the kitchen, Ariadne sighed before knowing exactly what she had to do. She might have been acting like a fool, but she honestly didn't want to loose him. Looking through the pills she found what she wanted and worked quickly, hoping he wouldn't hear.

Taking the spare door that lead to the hallway, Ariadne went into the spare bedroom and quickly changed. Pulling her hair into a ponytail she eyed herself in the mirror and knew this was honestly the only way she could break down someone's wall like Arthur's.

Turning, Ariadne ran to the kitchen and took a glass and filled it quickly with water.

"Please God let this work..."

Crumbling up the pills, she slipped the powder into the water and stirred it with her finger. Hurrying down the hall past the two sleeping dogs, she saw his bedroom door was slightly open.

"Arthur?"

She gently knocked before stepping inside.

Arthur now had on a faded old T-shirt, a style Ariadne honestly wasn't used to seeing him in. His hair combed back, he laid on his bed with his hands folded. His skin looked pale and his eyes seemed exhausted.

Cracking open an eye he stared at her as she walked over.

"I was wondering, if I could make a peace offer. I know it sounds crazy but I got the chills here, guess I don't want to be alone either."

She held out the water, right away Arthur raised an eyebrow before taking it and taking a large sip before putting it on the nightstand. Feeling nervous, Ariadne sighed.

"Mind if I lay with you?"

Arthur went to go say something when Ariadne shook her head.

"Sorry, that was stupid..."

"No, it's okay, come on."

Arthur patted the side of the bed. Looking, Ariadne smiled and walked around to the other side. Climbing onto the bed, she laid beside him, right away smelling the scent of clean soap. Resting her head on the pillow, she laid less than an inch away from him.

"You okay?"

Arthur looked over before nodding.

"Yeah, just tired. I'm really not one to open up like that."

"I'm sorry, I guess it's my nature to be overwhelming."

Smirking, Arthur closed his eyes and Ariadne watched him, softly breathing, waiting for it to be time.

_**2009**_

Arthur was in a penthouse apartment in Paris sharing a bottle of gin with Eames over a card game. It was late and Arthur felt exhausted. The year was almost over and Eames would be leaving soon. Just several months ago Arthur had been the one to finally put a stop to their never ending search to find who really had killed Regan. It had taken a lot out of him when finally the reality hit him that he had killed an innocent man. That there were people, just like the team he had joined that wanted him for his knowledge and skills. That his beautiful wife and unborn daughter had to pay the price. For a brief period of time he didn't trust anyone, not even Cobb. He locked himself away driving himself crazy before the only people he honestly had in his life...his friends came to help him. At first he thought of just quitting all together, then he knew he did have a purpose, then Regan would have died for nothing.

Still, night after night he was haunted by horrible dreams.

The guilt and pain were becoming too much.

One night he had gone through some of Regan's belongings in storage and found himself crying alone. He knew this hell would never stop unless he controlled it. Sitting there now, he stared up at the ceiling fan which slowly spun above him as Eames shuffled the deck.

Just then there was a horrible pounding on the front door, right away Arthur and Eames sat up, exchanging a look before both drew their guns and slowly got up, walking over to the door.

Nodding to Eames, Arthur opened the door, gin raised and aimed.

Cobb stood there, a complete mess.

Eames rolled his eyes as he lowered his gun.

"Jesus, you almost gave me a heart attack!"

Right away Arthur locked eyes with his friend.

"What's wrong?"

Cobb looked up at him, his eyes bloodshot and worn.

"Mal's dead."

_**2010**_

Ariadne listened to Arthur's smooth and calm breathing for what seemed like a lifetime. She laid there beside him as it continued to rain outside. Smelling the faint scent of soap, she stared at him and wondered what truly was going on in that head of his? She saw his chest slowly rise and fall and so badly just wanted to wrap her arms around him and feel safe.

Feeling like a fool, she knew she had overstepped her boundaries. They had sex, plain and simple. She had pushed too hard and now here they were. Like a complete idiot she admitted she loved him, even though they barley knew each other. He had taken her virginity, and had caused her heart to open up. She knew things about him that she doubted many others would even begin to find out about. She knew he had killed an innocent man thinking he was taking revenge and this had haunted him ever since. His wife, who had been his everything was raped and killed, and the child she was pregnant with died as well.

For a man so young, Arthur had suffered lifetimes. She now knew for certain even if he would throw her out or if she never saw him again she needed to see what was behind that mind of his. Maybe if she had an understanding, then maybe she could help him like she did with Cobb. She didn't want to see him die alone, something was special about him, in fact he was just like an angel.

"Arthur?"

She waited.

"Arthur?"

Still nothing. Slowly sitting up, Ariadne slid off the bed and went to the closet. She had spotted it earlier and hoped it was what she was looking for. Taking the silver suitcase, she opened it and sat it on the bed. Pulling the strings and needles on and pulled them up before getting back on the bed. She didn't know exactly how long he would be out, but she needed to see.

Injecting it in the same place as always, she took his arm and stuck the needle in as well. Arthur mumbled in his sleep and then was still. Feeling her heart racing, she closed her eyes and laid beside him.

_Ariadne blinked and found herself standing in the middle of an empty street in a suburb. It was early fall and the maple trees lining the street were beautiful colors of red, orange, and gold. _

"_I'm going to kill you."_

_Ariadne spun around to see Arthur glaring at her. Stepping forward his face crumpled and he swung his hand back striking her across the face. Not expecting it, Ariadne stumbled back and felt her cheek string._

_Arthur stood back, breathing heavy, his face flushed before raising his hands._

"_HOW DARE YOU DO THIS! WHAT THE HELL DID I SAY!"_

_Ariadne held her face before looking at him. Right away Arthur's eyes filled with regret before he took a step closer._

"_I'm sorry, are you okay?"_

_Ariadne cracked her jaw before shooting him a dirty look._

"_Try hitting a little harder there Arthur."_

_Right away Arthur looked up and around shaking his head._

"_What did you do to me?"_

"_I sedated you."_

_Arthur stared at her before looking around. Raising his hands he tugged at his hair ad huffed out his chest in annoyance._

"_What did I tell you..."_

_Ariadne looked around before a strong wind began blowing through the air. Standing there, watching the colorful trees dance madly, Ariadne's hair flew around her face before she held it down and saw Arthur staring at a certain house._

_It was small but cozy looking. There was a large farmer's porch on it with a swing. Half the house was stone and ivy grew up it's side. The yard was well kept and there were flower beds. Stepping forward, Ariadne stood beside Arthur as the wind continued to scream around them. Dried leafs danced around by their feet._

"_What is this?"_

_Sighing, Arthur ran his hand through his hair, trying his hardest to slick it back. _

"_It was my old house..."_

"_The one you grew up in?"_

_Arthur shook his head._

"_No, the one I lived in with Regan..."_

_Just then Arthur glanced down the road, making Ariadne turn. A car was approaching. _

"_It's the same dream, over and over again..."_

_The car drove past them and parked on the street. Moments later Ariadne was surprised to see Arthur get out of the very same car. A messenger bag thrown over his shoulder, and looking a few years younger. His hair a different style. Confused, Ariadne turned towards Arthur who stood beside her, watching himself closely._

"_I dream what would have happened if I came home a little early, earlier enough so whoever killed her didn't have their chance. A half an hour at the latest...what would have happened if she hadn't of died."_

_Both watched as Arthur walked down the pathway before heading up the stairs. Turning her shoulder, Ariadne saw an olde man across the street sitting on his front porch. She watched as the Arthur who was going into the house turned and waved to him. She watched as that Arthur checked the mail and then fished his keys out and opened the door._

"_Regan I'm home!"_

_Ariadne stood beside Arthur and saw the pain spread across his face. Nothing but pure regret swept across his eyes before he sighed and began to walk towards the house._

"_Come on..."_

"_Wait where? You want to go inside?"_

_Arthur turned, shooting her a dirty look._

"_You wanted to see so badly, now come on."_

_Taking a deep breath, Ariadne followed him towards the house._


	10. Chapter 10

_Ariadne and Arthur entered the house, before pushing the door Arthur sighed and turned towards her._

"_In my mind this is what would have happened if I came home early, if she hadn't been murdered..."_

_With wide brown eyes, Ariadne watched as the door with the stained glass opened..._

Arthur jingled his keys out as he found the right one and unlocked the front door.

"Regan! I'm home!"

The door opened silently as Arthur stepped inside, looking around he right away smelt something baking in the kitchen. Just a few months ago, Regan had picked up an old cookbook at a flea market and every few days would test her cooking abilities. In the beginning both Arthur and Regan had a few good laughs over the fact they mostly would burn everything. Lately though, Regan seemed to be getting the hang of it and Arthur often joked she would be the reason he would have to start jogging again after eating all these cookies, cakes, and pies.

Taking his messenger bag off and tossing it on the chair near the door, right away Arthur looked forward to a nice peaceful relaxing long weekend with his wife. He just wanted to hang out by the pool with her, get drunk, and sleep in. Stepping on the hardwood floor, Arthur shoved his hands in his pockets and strolled on over to the kitchen.

There she stood.

She looked beautiful.

She was in that dress and tights he thought she looked cute in, and her hair was at a side ponytail. She was leaning against the counter mixing something and listening to the radio. Just then Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell's Ain't no mountain high enough began playing on the radio. One thing he loved about Regan was the fact they shared the same music taste, which raged from indie punk, the classics like this.

Regan's big blue eyes lifted and she stared at him, right away a smile appearing on her face.

"Hey you..."

Arthur began playfully dancing towards her, lip-syncing the words to her and bobbing his head. Laughing, Regan put the bowl down on the counter and wiped her hands on a dish towel as Arthur circled her.

Lip-syncing the words back to him, she placed her arms on his shoulders as they sung to each other, holding back from laughing. Picking her up from the waist, Arthur lifted her and began to twirl her.

In the doorway, Arthur and Ariadne watched this happy scene play-out. Sighing, Ariadne looked up at Arthur and saw the pain in his eyes.

"This is what I always thought the day would have been like if none of this would of happened..."

Arthur said without looking away, the music continued to play on before they watched Arthur and Regan press their foreheads against each other.

Gently kissing her husband's lips. Regan nervously smiled at him as the song began to end.

"I have a surprise for you."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, let's go sit down."

Raising an eyebrow, Arthur tickled his nose with hers before deeply kissing her.

"I'm in suspense, what is it?"

"Come on..."

Regan tugged on his arm, bringing him to the other room. All the while Arthur and Ariadne stayed in the shadows watching, not saying a word.

In the living room. Regan led Arthur to their chair and sat him down.

"Stay there a second."

Smiling, Arthur watched as she ran up the stairs, a few seconds later the sound of her footsteps coming down the stairs filled the room before she appeared again holding an envelope. Looking extremely nervous, Regan walked over to him before sitting on his lap. Laughing, Arthur looked at her.

"What's up with you?"

Regan stared down at her husband very closely before handing him the envelope.

"Here, open it."

Smiling, Arthur raised his eyebrow again before slowly ripping it open, taking the card out he looked at the cover and right away his eyes became confused. Opening it, he read the inside and fell silent. No expression or emotion was seen in his eyes. Nervously, Regan twisted her hands together waiting for a response.

"So?"

Arthur's eyes then lit up as reality settled in. Looking up, right away the biggest smile appeared on his face before his eyes locked with hers.

"You're pregnant?"

Regan smiled before quickly nodding, before she could even say a word Arthur grabbed her and kissed her as hard as he could.

Arthur and Ariadne watched in the background. Sighing, Arthur shook his head.

"I always used to pretend what it would have been like if none of this would of happened. How she would have told me, my reaction...it was perfect."

Arthur pressed his forehead against Regan's, and softly smiled.

Regan pulled away slightly, cocking her head and smiling.

"You sure you're happy?"

Arthur laced his hands into hers before he brought his other hand behind her head, bringing her in for another kiss. Right away the card Regan had written him slowly fell to the ground.

"Come on..."

Arthur told Ariadne as they began going up the stairs. Arthur pressed his hand against Ariadne's back and turned her away, slowly bringing her up the stairs. Passing the framed photographs, Ariadne saw Arthur and his wife's entire life, played out frozen in time.

Once they reached upstairs Arthur stopped and stared at the long hallway.

"This was where she was killed, I found her laying there..."

Ariadne gazed over the wooden floor, her eyes lifting she noticed at the stained glass window at the end raindrops were falling outside.

Arthur took her arm and lead to the the doorway of the master bedroom, there a mid afternoon sunlight poured out through the curtains, showing every single tiny golden piece of dust.

On the bed was Regan, six or seven months along in her pregnancy. She wore a rolled up T-shirt and slacks. Her very pregnancy stomach stuck up from her tiny frame. Kneeling on the bed was Arthur in jeans and a band T-shirt. His hair messy, something Ariadne wasn't used to seeing.

He had his ear against her stomach and was laughing. Ariadne watched as Regan laid there, giggling before Arthur lifted his head and looked down at her.

"She's kicking up a storm..."

Smiling, Ariadne drummed her fingers against her stomach.

"That's because she wants out..."

Arthur then turned from the doorway and began going down the hall, Ariadne continued watching Regan and Arthur before noticing he was gone. Turning, she followed him to the next door where Arthur stood. Right away before Ariadne reached the doorway and looked in she heard beeping and voices.

Looking in she saw Regan sitting up in a hospital bed. Her beautiful dark hair held back from a hairnet, and dressed in a hospital gown. There were two nurses and a doctor working between her two legs. Arthur meanwhile stood beside her in jeans and a button up shirt squeezing her hand, looking nervous and scared.

"Push Regan come on!"

Regan threw her head back crying before squeezing Arthur's hand and snapping her eyes shut. Screaming, she pushed with all her might before the sound of crying filled the air. Ariadne stretched her neck to see the baby but before the doctor lifted it up the door slammed right in her and Arthur's face, causing her to jump.

"What the hell happened?"

"I could never make up past then, I of course thought of what it would be like, me and Regan teaching our daughter how to walk, her first words, dropping her off at daycare, how we would grow old together watching our baby grow up. How she would look exactly like Regan, and maybe when she was in high school we had another baby...this time a boy..."

He began walking down the hallway, thunder sounded in the distance.

Arthur went to the last door with Ariadne in which she heard running water. Right away her eyed widened and she held back a scream when she looked in.

In the perfectly white and clean bathroom, blood had been splattered everywhere. Floating in an overflowing tub of bloody water was Regan.

Arthur looked in sighing.

"And somehow, no matter how much I make up the perfectly future, it's always shattered because deep down inside I know those bastards would still kill her, whenever they had a chance..."

For a split second Ariadne thought she saw a tiny body floating with Regan's in the bathtub before the door slammed shut. Turning towards Arthur all she wanted to do was cry. Arthur met her eyes, looking dead and empty of any emotion. Turning away, he started down the hallway.

Ariadne watched as he started back down the stairs. Looking around, she now knew how heartbreaking these fake memories were. Arthur wasn't like Cobb at all. His mind wasn't trapped in past memories he shared with his wife...these were stories, make up little things that haunted him for years.

She followed him in silence before reaching downstairs, she just caught Arthur as he was making his way for the back porch. Sighing, she followed him and noticed right away that it was sunny out. Following him, she stood yet again in the back doorway where she heard crickets and birds chirp. Taking a second, she watched as Arthur stood on the back deck, hands in his pockets and looking out at something. Looking around, she saw it was a gorgeous day. Stepping out, she heard a splash of water and stood beside him, looking down.

She saw Regan swimming in the pool in a dark red two-piece bathing suit. She was swimming underneath the crystal clear water, looking nothing but beautiful. Standing beside him, she looked before Arthur cleared his throat.

"This is one of my favorite memories of us...in fact my favorite photo of her was taken away."

Ariadne watched before looking up at Arthur.

"You can't forgive yourself for what happened. You hide it so much it's been killing you. Now you don't care anymore if you live or die...you've gotten used to the idea of being alone."

Arthur shot her a look.

"So?"

Ariadne looked at him.

"Arthur, none of this wasn't any of your fault. Regan would have wanted you to keep living, for her, and your baby..."

Arthur looked down, back to watching his wife swim in the pool down below.

"Yeah, sure..."

"Arthur please..."

Ariadne pleaded with him, staring up with helpless eyes. Staring down, Arthur sighed before he heard Regan's lovely voice call up to him.

"Arthur! You coming in?"

Looking down he saw Regan's big blue eyes smile up at him, waiting for him to be with her. Closing his eyes, he sighed feeling his heart dully ache. At that exact moment...

He opened his eyes and woke up.

Taking a second he blinked a few times before looking over at Ariadne who sat beside him. Both had been sleeping side by side as it continued to rain outside. Both locked eyes and before Arthur could say anything...

She reached out and kissed him.


	11. Chapter 11

When Arthur and Ariadne woke both were shaking.

It had started to rain again and Kim and Novak were fast asleep on the floor below them. Artiadne found her arms tightly around Arthur, clutching him. Once her eyes opened, they locked with her and she felt nothing but heartbreak. Now she honestly knew why Arthur had lost the will to live.

Arthur stared at her.

"I think you better go now."

Frowning, Ariadne knew there wasn't much she could do. She had gotten her wish and seen into Arthur's life. Unlike Cobb, there wasn't anything to face. Everything had been said and done and Arthur couldn't fix what had happened. Knowing she had over stepped her boundaries, it was time for her to move on. Staring at him, she looked back on their time together. They had shared more than dreams...

She remembered laying underneath him on the kitchen floor.

She loved him, but knew he couldn't feel the same way about her.

Pulling away, she sat up and stared at him.

"Will you get help? You shouldn't waste your life like this Arthur."

Sitting up himself, Arthur sighed before staring at her. His eyes tired.

"I'll drive you to your sisters..."

Shooting Arthur a look, she stood up and stared at him.

"Don't bother, I'll get a cab."

"Ariadne..."

Walking out she ingored him, figjting back tears.

_Later..._

Arthur stood on his front porck, rain pouring down on him. Ariadne stood with her suitcase as the cab sat parked out front. Both stared at each other before she stood on her tip-toes and gently kissed his cheek.

"Please take care of yourself Arthur, Regan wouldn't have wanted this..."

Before she could see his reaction she turned and went down the steps, hauling her suitcase towards the cab. Standing there, getting soaked Arthur watched her.

He waited until the cab came and went and finally he turned his face up towards the rain. Reaching into his pocket he felt the loaded die and sighed.

Going back inside, he slipped his soaked shirt off and rung it out before going down the hall. His dogs were fast asleep in the living room and the rain outside had gotten even louder.

He thought back on those memories and thoughts he had shared with Ariadne and knew she was right. As much as he wanted to die, this wasn't the way.

Strolling over to the phone, he picked it up and called his doctor. Closing his eyes, another headache over came him.

He prayed it wasn't too late.

_Meanwhile..._

Ariadne sat in the cab chewing at her nails as the driver drove her to her sister's. Thinking back on the last twenty-four hours she got a chill.

She loved Arthur, as crazy as that sounded...but she knew he would never love her.

The love of his life was gone.

Sighing, she watched the rain hit the windshield and hoped he would listen to her.

It was a sin to waste such a life.

Sitting back, she thought back on their time together and how softy his lips felt against hers. Closing her eyes she wished that was a dream she could escape to whenever she wanted to.

But she opened her eyes again and knew reality was there. Fighting back tears, she wondered what her future held.

Unknown to her, she was going to help Arthur live more than she thought.


	12. Chapter 12

"How you feeling honey?"

Janice the nurse asked as she walked over to where Arthur was sitting in the clinic. Arthur sat hooked up to his chemotherapy machine and sat back with his legs up. Further down there were several other people doing their own treatment. One that broke Arthur's heart was a sixteen year old girl who had lost all of her hair. She wore scars around her head, almost like how Regan used to and most of the time sat listening to her I-pod.

An older man, around sixty sat closer to him. He usually was reading the newspaper and would comment out loud about the sports scores and then mumble before turning the page.

Arthur had been in treatment for almost six months now. It had moved painfully show, but when Arthur finally made the choice to get treatment, he was stunned to hear that he wasn't as hopeless as he believed he was. Of course his doctor cursed him up and down for not coming sooner. He asked what the hell he had been doing for so long? In which Arthur answered...working. They ran tests, took blood, and Arthur even spent a week in the hospital to get his levels up. The tumor hadn't grown, but it was in a tricky spot. Before they could even talk about getting it removed they needed to work on freezing it and stopping it in its tracks.

Which was when the treatment came in.

It had been rough, mostly dealing with this alone. Arthur had hired on a housekeeper to watch his dogs as he went into the city four times a week for treatment. Some nights he was so drawn and sick, he had to get a hotel close by instead of driving.

Cobb visited a month or so in with Eames, both arrived at the clinic. Eames had flowers and a stupid sly grin spread across his face. Arthur had been dozing off that day when he hears Eames say...

"Hello darling."

Arthur had opened his eyes to see his two friends, he was stunned to see them. Eames shoved the flowers at Arthur before grabbing a chair for himself a Cobb.

"So, are they juicing you up nicely here?"

Arthur sat up slightly confused before Cobb gave a small smirk and patted Arthur on the shoulder.

"I've been trying to contact you, I talked with your housekeeper, why didn't you tell me?"

Arthur shrugged, he honestly never liked being fussed over. Putting the flowers on the table beside him he looked at his two friends.

"Didn't think it was a big deal."

Eames and Cobb exchanged a look.

"How long?"

"What?"

"How long have you been sick?"

"Does it matter?"

"To us yes."

Arthur sighed.

"A while now...I finally decided to do something about it before it was too late."

He left out the path that Ariadne had been the reason he changed his mind. Up until then for nearly a year before all of this had happened, he had prayed for death. Now here he was fighting it.

For most of the afternoon Cobb and Eames stayed with him. Cobb explained he was now "retired" and spending his time with his children. Showing Arthur photos, he grinned. He had known Cobb's children since they were born, in fact he had sorta felt like an uncle to them before Mal had died.

"Their getting big..."

He said, feeling a small pang of pain in his heart, knowing he would have had a daughter growing up if Regan hadn't been killed.

Eames was still working of course, over in Europe and was telling them about the latest case. He joked that nothing could have been as amazing as their last adventure in which Arthur gave a dry laugh at. They talked for a while, and Arthur could sense underneath it all his friends were worried about him. Underneath it all, they loved Arthur like family...and knowing that all this time he had been sick and had been hiding it scared them.

"Have you seen Ariadne?"

Eames asked with a smirk.

Arthur leaned back in his chair, he knew within the hour his treatment would he over, but he all ready felt dizzy.

"No...have you?"

Eames nodded looking at his nails, slightly amused.

"I ran into her a few weeks back while I was spending a weekend in Paris. Our little student seems to have a bun in the oven."

Arthur's eyes widened.

"What?"

Eames smiled.

"Yep, we ran into each other and she seemed real embarrassed, poor little thing...she waddles when she walks. I asked how the father was and she just gave me some smart ass remark. She's still in school...didn't say any of her plans...but she asked about you two."

Cobb and Arthur exchanged a look before Eames asked tapping on Arthur's machine when he would be all juiced up and ready, he was buying drinks.

That evening the three of them went to dinner. Arthur didn't drink, nor eat a lot. He was exhausted and knew that the mix of the chemo and news about Ariadne was making him feel dizzy and weak. Cobb seemed to notice it while Eames drank glass after glass of wine and kept joking about. By the end of the evening Cobb offered to drive Arthur back to his house.

Eames had patted Arthur on the back, giving him a big friendly kiss on the cheek and told him to behave himself. Arthur pulled away giving Eames a dirty look as Eames laughed and stumbled down the sidewalk to his hotel.

"I see things haven't changed..."

Arthur mumbled as Cobb laughed and walked him to his car.

The drive to his house was silent as Cobb drove on the highway. Finally Cobb glanced over at Arthur who was running his hand through his hair. He had been lucky not to have lost any of his hair yet, but he felt it thinning.

"What's on your mind?"

Arthur glanced over at Cobb.

"Nothing, why?"

"You seem like something is bothering you..."

Arthur shook his head.

"Just tired..."

"You seemed bothered when Eames told you about Ariadne, have you seen her since the last job?"

Arthur wanted to lie as he had with Eames, but Cobb had been his friend. Cobb had been the one who had shown him he wasn't alone in this new world they had all discovered. He had been there for Cobb after Mal, and both understood what it was like to loose someone from this job, and how to try and deal with reality.

But Cobb was now home, he had his children...Arthur had nobody. Whoever had murdered Regan had taken the child they had so badly wanted away as well. Now for so long he had put up a front. Acted distant and just did his job...now for the first time he had been faced with a choice.

Live or die.

He was fighting, and he honestly thought it was because of Ariadne, she reminded him so much of Regan it wasn't even funny. That rainy afternoon they spent together after the airport had changed everything. She was the first one he had welcomed to open his mind to. She knew about his horrible mistake and guilt with Regan's doctor, and the fact that revenge wasn't the only answer. In fact...it made things worse.

Thinking of the two of them laying on his kitchen floor he felt a shutter deep inside his chest. He wasn't trying to figure anything out, his life was a mess as it was...but here he was.

He was trying to fight the best he could. If he died, then he could be with his wife again. If he lived...at least he knew then he wasn't giving up. He knew Regan had tried to fight to life, and sadly lost...he didn't want to ever face her in whatever afterlife there was and tell he he didn't even have the will to go on. Even though after the doctor's murder he was almost positive he wasn't ever going to see her again.

He knew if he did live then he would just keep working. He knew Cobb was finished, but he more than likely would team up with Eames and keep doing what he did best. He had good control, and maybe he would die alone. At this point it didn't seem to matter. He had his happiness as brief as it was. Some people never have such a thing and their only escape was their dreams.

He had both.

"We slept together."

Arthur said in a dry voice which filled the silence of the car as Cobb drove. Arthur sat there looking out the window at the darkness of the freeway as Cobb glanced over.

"When?"

"When we got back, she came over to my place...I told her about Regan...in fact I told her about everything...afterwards she was the one who told me to try and get help...I took her advice and she left..."

Cobb looked at his friend before taking the exit.

"Eames said she's pregnant."

Arthur continued to stare out the window.

"Yeah..."

"Do you...think?"

Cobb didn't finish, instead Arthur just stared out the window as the night passed them by. Afterward Cobb brought hm to his house. The front driveway lights were on.

"You need help?"

Cobb asked as the parked. Arthur smirked.

"I have cancer Cobb, I didn't loose my legs."

Cobb looked amused before patting his friend's shoulder. Arthur glanced at him before Cobb spoke.

"You should go see her. Yeah she's young...but I think she's good for you. I watched you guys while we were planning the job...first time I had seen you smile in years."

Arthur shot Cobb a look.

"Ariadne is living her own life, and so aren't I. Listen, I was messed up for a while but I still have a lot to do...I might not even make it."

"Don't say that..."

"It's true. The doctors have been honest with me. Yeah I'm doing the treatments, and yeah I look all right..but the whole half a year I waited really cost me. My odds aren't that good and I've made peace with it."

"More of a reason to talk to her."

Arthur shook his head.

"I just need to be alone right now."

Cobb nodded.

"All right, but just remember...do you want to take a leap of faith or die an old man...filled with regret..."

"Waiting to die alone?"

Cobb smirked before Arthur looked at him.

"Thanks for coming by."

"Eames and I will be in the city for the next few weeks."

"All right, I'll give you guys a call. I would really like to see the kids."

Cobb smiled before Arthur got out of the car and walked up the walkway to the front door. Taking his keys out he watched as Cobb's headlights flashed across the house and then dissevered. Sighing, Arthur opened his front door and suddenly felt weak.

His legs buckled and he fell hard onto the floor. Right away Kim and Novak barked and ran over licking his face. Arthur leaned against his door, taking shallow breaths as his hands and face grew numb. Closing his eyes he thought of what Cobb said and passed out.

His housekeeper found him the next day and tried to bring him to the hospital. By then Arthur felt weak, but able to walk and told her he just fell asleep there and laid down to rest. Now here he was, back in chemo and feeling worse than ever. He ignored Eames's calls on his cell and just sat back hoeing his horrible aching in his head would stop soon. That's when the nurse asked how he was feeling. Arthur opened his eyes and gave a weak smile and said he was fine. She said she was going to bring over some ice chips for him before walking away.

Sitting there watching everyone else, he almost didn't believe it as Ariadne walked over to him.

She was wearing a loose fitting blouse and slacks. A scarf around her neck and her lovely brown hair tied back. She walked over and the first thing Arthur noticed was her stomach.

It had been nearly seven months since he last saw her, and from the looks of her she looked like she was nearly done with her pregnancy. Her stomach looked so out of place on her tiny little frame, and like Eames said she waddled as she walked.

Yet, Arthur remembered how beautiful she looked.

Ariadne stopped right in front of him and smiled.

"Hi."

Arthur blinked at first his throat felt dry and he didn't think he could speak.

"Um...hi."

She softly smiled before pulling up a chair beside him, her tiny hands rested on her stomach.

"I have something to tell you."

She said, not letting them dance around the subject. Arthur felt sick and tried his hardest to sit up straight. Ariadne stared at him before the nurse came over with the plastic cup filled with ice chips.

"Here you go honey..."

Arthur felt like he was in a daze and thanked her, not taking his eyes off Ariadne. The nurse felt Arthur's forehead and frowned.

"Oh, I think you might have a fever. I'll come and check up on you in a little bit. You just relax...oh! Who's this pretty little thing?"

Ariadne smiled and offered her hand.

"Ariadne, I'm a friend of Arthur."

The nurse shook her hand smiling.

"Oh that's nice, Arthur here is my most handsome and polite patient. You keep an eye on him you hear?"

Ariadne laughed as the nurse walked off and then looked at him. Arthur cleared his throat before she looked at the machines that were hooked up to him.

"So how are you doing?"

Arthur didn't take his eyes off her.

"Dying...yourself?"

Ariadne smiled before looking down at her stomach.

"You know, the whole reason I was scared to loose my virginity was so stupid...I always was scared I would get pregnant with the first guy I slept with. Funny how life works out huh?"

Arthur looked at her stunned, most of the color from his face had left him. He just sat there unable to speak nor move. Ariadne smiled, amused by his expression before rubbing her stomach.

"I need to talk to you Arthur, it's important."


	13. Chapter 13

By the time Ariadne finished Arthur felt the most overwhelming feeling of reality hitting him. It reminded him a lot like a kick whenever he awoke from a dream. Sitting there he just stared at Ariadne as she nervously picked at the fabric of her slacks before looking up.

"If you are about to ask if I'm sure, I'm one hundred percent. You have been the only one Arthur, and trust me, this came as much as a surprise to me, I still have another two years at school I'm living off scholarships and my family has never been that close...this was honestly the last thing I expected."

Arthur didn't say a word, he just stared as she went on. Taking a deep breath she pushed some of her fallen hair out of her face.

"I'm not crying poor, trust me after we worked together I'm set money wise, beyond set in fact. It's just...this wasn't planned. I never honestly thought my first time would have been like that let alone resulting in this. Arthur, I like you a lot...and I understand there's a lot going on in that mind of yours. Trust me, you've been through hell and back...but I guess the reason why I didn't freak out about the pregnancy was because I heard about you trying to get better. That shows me your the fighter I thought you were...I hope I had a little something to do with you changing your mind."

Arthur didn't bother to ask questions, instead he just stared at her before she cleared her throat and nervously smiled.

"Say something."

Arthur stared at her stomach before looking her in the eye.

"Why didn't you tell me Ariadne?"

Ariadne sighed staring down at her stomach.

"Because I had to be honestly with myself and with you. When I first found out I was scared...in fact scared isn't even the right word. Down right terrified is better. I didn't know what to do or who to go to...as ugly as this even sounds the thought of having an abortion crossed my mind..."

She dropped her eyes this time as she continued to speak.

"I made a million lists of pros and cons. I have so many sleepless nights wondering what I was going to do...then I heard about what you were trying to do and I decided this had happened for a reason."

"Does your family know?"

"Only my sister, I've been staying with her while I'm on break. I told her the father was a man I briefly worked with, and that I was planning on telling you."

"How far along are you?"

"I'm going into my seventh month. I would have told you sooner but I honestly just found out about you. After it was too late to get an abortion I made peace with what was happening. I was thinking about giving it up for adoption...something that I'm still thinking about."

"What?"

"Arthur, I need to be down right serious with you. I don't want to be a mother. I know that's a horrible thing to say but I don't. Maybe that's a reason why I always threw myself into my studies and school. I've always wanted to be the best of the best in my career no matter how much hard work it takes. This is a goal I've set for myself years ago and I know if I don't reach it I'll only regret the reason why I stopped. I understand I'm young, and my sister keeps telling me giving this baby up will my harder than I'll never know...but it's something I think I can really live with. Besides, I wouldn't be the parent it deserves."

"So...what are your plans?"

Arthur asked, his voice felt dry. Ariadne stared at him before looking at her nails and then back at him.

"I wanted to ask if you wanted to be part of the baby's life. I understand everything you've been through and I understand how sick you are, but when I ran into Eames he leveled with me and said you might make it. I know this is a stupid thing to ask, most of all with everything that's happening to you...but I need to ask you."

"Ariadne are you serious?"

Ariadne nodded.

"Your it's father Arthur, and your somebody as much as we're strangers...somebody I care and worry about. Your a fighter and I think you might just beat this...but I understand how lonely you are. I think you need a reason to keep going so I want to offer you the chance to raise the baby. I understand if you can't...I won't judge you. My sister and I have been looking into families..."

"That's exactly it Ariadne, this baby needs a family. A mother and a father. I'm sick and screwed up..."

"I think your selling yourself short. You are brilliant, caring, and smart. I think your somebody who I would trust and be comforted knowing you were raising our baby. I just can't do it Arthur and I know if I don't offer this to you now, I never will."

Arthur glared at her.

"I'm dying Ariadne...you can't be serious."

"We're all dying Arthur, I'm just letting you know you have a chance to live for something...think about it. I'll be in the city for a few more weeks. If you decide you don't want this I understand. Here's my number and..."

She handed him a card and a folder.

"And a photo of our son."

Getting up she stared at him.

"Bye Arthur, I hope I hear from you..."

Before he could say another word she was leaving. Sitting there Arthur slowly opened the folder and stared at the ultrasound.

He remembered doing this so many years ago and looking at his daughter.

Now he had a son.

A son.

Sitting there he stared at the ultrasound and his brow wrinkled.

Die he want to take a leap of faith...or be an old man filled with regret...

Waiting to die.


End file.
